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暮光之城2：新月|New Moon

第三章：结束|Chapter 3 The End

属类： 双语小说 【分类】魔幻小说 -[作者: 斯蒂芬妮-梅耶] 阅读：[13410]
《暮光之城》是美国作家斯蒂芬妮·梅尔 （Stephenie Meyer）写的系列小说，包括《暮色》、《新月》、《月食》、《破晓》以及番外《布里·坦纳第二次短暂生命》、《暮色重生》和《午夜阳光》。《暮光之城》系列以伊莎贝拉·斯旺和爱德华·卡伦一对苦命鸳鸯的情感纠葛为主线，融合了吸血鬼传说、狼人故事、校园生活、恐怖悬念、喜剧冒险等各种元素，而凄美动人的爱情则是全书“最强烈的情绪”。
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I FELT ABSOLUTELY HIDEOUS IN THE MORNING. I HADN'T slept well; my arm burned andmy head ached. It didn't help my outlook that Edward's face was smooth and remote as he kissed myforehead quickly and ducked out my window. I was afraid of the time I'd spent unconscious, afraid thathe might have been thinking about right and wrong again while he watched me sleep. The anxiety seemedto ratchet up the intensity of the pounding in my head.

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Edward was waiting for me at school, as usual, but his face was still wrong. There was something buriedin his eyes that I couldn't be sure of—and it scared me. I didn't want to bring up last night, but I wasn'tsure if avoiding the subject would be worse.

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He opened my door for me.

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"How do you feel?""Perfect," I lied, cringing as the sound of the slamming door echoed in my head.

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We walked in silence, he shortening his stride to match mine. There were so many questions I wanted toask, but most of those questions would have to wait, because chey were for Alice: How was Jasper thismorning? What had they said when I was gone? What had Rosalie said? And most importantly, whatcould she see happening now in her strange, imperfect visions of the future? Could she guess whatEdward was thinking, why he was so gloomy? Was there a foundation for the tenuous, instinctive fearsthat I couldn't seem to shake?

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The morning passed slowly. I was impatient to see Alice, though I wouldn't be able to really talk to herwith Edward there. Edward remained aloof. Occasionally he would ask about my arm, and I would lie.

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Alice usually beat us to lunch; she didn't have to keep pace with a sloth like me. But she wasn't at thetable, waiting with a tray of food she wouldn't eat.

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Edward didn't say anything about her absence. I wondered to myself if her class was running late—until Isaw Conner and Ben, who were in her fourth hour French class.

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"Where's Alice?" I asked Edward anxiously.

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He looked at the granola bar he was slowly pulverizing between his fingertips while he answered. "She'swith Jasper.""Is he okay?""He's gone away for a while.""What? Where?"Edward shrugged. "Nowhere in particular.""And Alice, too," I said with quiet desperation. Of course, if Jasper needed her, she would go.

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"Yes. She'll be gone for a while. She was trying to convince him to go to Denali."Denali was where the one other band of unique vampires—good ones like the Cullens—lived. Tanya and her family. I'd heard of them now and again. Edward had run to them last winter when my arrival hadmade Forks difficult for him. Laurent, the most civilized member of James's little coven, had gone thererather than siding with James against the Cullens. It made sense for Alice to encourage Jasper to gothere.

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I swallowed, trying to dislodge the sudden lump in my throat. The guilt made my head bow and myshoulders slump. I'd run them out of their home, just like Rosalie and Emmett. I was a plague.

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"Is your arm bothering you?" he asked solicitously.

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"Who cares about my stupid arm?" I muttered in disgust.

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He didn't answer, and I put my head down on the table.

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By the end of the day, the silence was becoming ridiculous. I didn't want to be the one to break it, butapparently that was my only choice if I ever wanted him to talk to me again.

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"You'll come over later tonight?" I asked as he walked me—silently—to my truck. He always came over.

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"Later?"It pleased me that he seemed surprised. "I have to work. I had to trade with Mrs. Newton to getyesterday off.""Oh," he murmured.

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"So you'll come over when I'm home, though, right?" I hated that I felt suddenly unsure about this.

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"If you want me to.""I always want you," I reminded him, with perhaps a little more intensity than the conversation required.

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I expected he would laugh, or smile, or react somehow to my words.

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"All right, then," he said indifferently.

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He kissed my forehead again before he shut the door on me. Then he turned his back and lopedgracefully toward his car.

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I was able to drive out of the parking lot before the panic really hit, but I was hyperventilating by the timeI got to Newton's.

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He just needed time, I told myself. He would get over this. Maybe he was sad because his family wasdisappearing. But Alice and Jasper would come back soon, and Rosalie and Emmett, too. If it wouldhelp, I would stay away from the big white house on the river—I'd never set foot there again. That didn'tmatter. I'd still see Alice at school. She would have to come back for school, right? And she was at myplace all the time anyway. She wouldn't want to hurt Charlie's feelings by staying away.

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No doubt I would also run into Carlisle with regularity—in the emergency room.

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After all, what had happened last night was nothing. Nothing had happened. So I fell down—that wasthe story of my life. Compared to last spring, it seemed especially unimportant. James had left me brokenand nearly dead from loss of blood—and yet Edward had handled the interminable weeks in the hospitalmuch better than this. Was it because, this time, it wasn't an enemy he'd had to protect me from?

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Because it was his brother?

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Maybe it would be better if he took me away, rather than his family being scattered. I grew slightly lessdepressed as I considered all the uninterrupted alone time. If he could just last through the school year,Charlie wouldn't be able to object. We could go away to college, or pretend that's what we were doing,like Rosalie and Emmett this year. Surely Edward could wait a year. What was a year to an immortal? Itdidn't even seem like that much to me.

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I was able to talk myself into enough composure to handle getting out of the truck and walking to thestore. Mike Newton had beaten me here today, and he smiled and waved when I came in. I grabbed myvest, nodding vaguely in his direction. I was still imagining pleasant scenarios that consisted of me runningaway with Edward to various exotic locales.

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Mike interrupted my fantasy. "How was your birthday?""Ugh," I mumbled. "I'm glad it's over."Mike looked at me from the corners of his eyes like I was crazy.

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Work dragged. I wanted to see Edward again, praying that he would be past the worst of this, whateverit was exactly, by the time I saw him again. It's nothing, I told myself over and over again. Everything willgo back to normal.

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The relief I felt when I turned onto my street and saw Edward's silver car parked in front of my housewas an overwhelming, heady thing. And it bothered me deeply that it should be that way.

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I hurried through the front door, calling out before I was completely inside.

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"Dad? Edward?"As I spoke, I could hear the distinctive theme music from ESPN's SportsCenter coming from the livingroom.

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"In here," Charlie called.

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I hung my raincoat on its peg and hurried around the corner.

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Edward was in the armchair, my father on the sofa. Both had their eyes trained on the TV. The focus wasnormal for my father. Not so much for Edward.

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"Hi," I said weakly.

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"Hey, Bella," my father answered, eyes never moving. "We just had cold pizza. I think it's still on thetable.""Okay."I waited in the doorway. Finally, Edward looked over at me with a polite smile. "I'll be right behind you,"he promised. His eyes strayed back to the TV.

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I stared for another minute, shocked. Neither one seemed to notice. I could feel something, panic maybe,building up in my chest. I escaped to the kitchen.

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The pizza held no interest for me. I sat in my chair, pulled my knees up, and wrapped my arms aroundthem. Something was very wrong, maybe more wrong than I'd realized. The sounds of male bonding andbanter continued from the TV set.

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I tried to get control of myself, to reason with myself.

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What's the worst that can happen? I flinched. That was definitely the wrong question to ask. I washaving a hard time breathing right.

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Okay, I thought again, what's the worst I can live through? I didn't like that question so much, either.

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But I thought through the possibilities I'd considered today.

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Staying away from Edward's family. Of course, he wouldn't expect Alice to be part of that. But if Jasperwas off limits, that would lessen the time I could have with her. I nodded to myself—I could live withthat.

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Or going away. Maybe he wouldn't want to wait till the end of the school year, maybe it would have tobe now.

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In front of me, on the table, my presents from Charlie and Renee were where I had left them, the cameraI hadn't had the chance to use at the Cullens' sitting beside the album. I touched the pretty cover of thescrapbook my mother had given me, and sighed, thinking of Renee. Somehow, living without her for aslong as I had did not make the idea of a more permanent separation easier. And Charlie would be left allalone here, abandoned. They would both be so hurt…But we'd come back, right? We'd visit, of course, wouldn't we?

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I couldn't be certain about the answer to that.

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I leaned my cheek against my knee, staring at the physical tokens of my parents' love. I'd known this pathI'd chosen was going to be hard. And, after all, I was thinking about the worst-case scenario—the veryworst I could live through.

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I touched the scrapbook again, flipping the front cover over. Little metal corners were already in place tohold the first picture. It wasn't a half-bad idea, to make some record of my life here. I felt a strange urgeto get started. Maybe I didn't have that long left in Forks.

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I toyed with the wrist strap on the camera, wondering about the first picture on the roll. Could it possiblyturn out anything close to the original? I doubted it. But he didn't seem worried that it would be blank. Ichuckled to myself, thinking of his carefree laughter last night. The chuckle died away. So much hadchanged, and so abruptly. It made me feel a little bit dizzy, like I was standing on an edge, a precipicesomewhere much too high.

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I didn't want to think about that anymore. I grabbed the camera and headed up the stairs.

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My room hadn't really changed all that much in the seventeen years since my mother had been here. Thewalls were still light blue, the same yellowed lace curtains hung in front of the window. There was a bed,rather than a crib, but she would recognize the quilt draped untidily over the top—it had been a gift ROMGran.

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Regardless, I snapped a picture of my room. There wasn't much else I could do tonight—it was too darkoutside—and the feeling was growing stronger, it was almost a compulsion now. I would recordeverything about Forks before I had to leave it.

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Change was coming. I could feel it. It wasn't a pleasant prospect, not when life was perfect the way itwas.

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I took my time coming back down the stairs, camera in hand, trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach as I thought of the strange distance I didn't want to see in Edward's eyes. He would get overthis. Probably he was worried that I would be upset when he asked me to leave. I would let him workthrough it without meddling. And I would be prepared when he asked.

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I had the camera ready as I leaned around the corner, being sneaky. I was sure there was no chance thatI had caught Edward by surprise, but he didn't look up. I felt a brief shiver as something icy twisted in mystomach; I ignored that and took the picture.

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They both looked at me then. Charlie frowned. Edward's face was empty, expressionless.

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