通译双语文库:心是孤独的猎手第一部分 5

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镇上的一个黑人区，远离主街，本尼迪克特·马迪·科普兰医生独自坐在黑乎乎的厨房里。已经过了九点，现在周日的钟声也停了。尽管夜晚非常炎热，但圆肚子柴火炉里仍然生着一堆小小的火。科普兰医生坐在火炉旁边，在一张直背餐椅上前倾着身体，两只瘦长的手捧着脑袋。炉子缝隙中透出的红光照在他的脸上——在这种光线下，他厚厚的嘴唇在黑皮肤的映衬下，几乎变成了紫色。他的头发灰白，紧贴着头皮，像一顶羊毛帽子，也显出一种蓝色。他保持着这个姿势，一动不动坐了很久，即便一双眼睛也透过银色眼镜框直直地瞪着，目光依然凝固而忧郁。然后，他重重地清了清喉咙，从椅子旁边的地上拿起一本书。在他周围，房间里非常暗，他必须把书凑近火炉才能辨认出上面的字。今晚他看的是斯宾诺莎的书。那些错综复杂的思想和话语，他并不能完全理解，但在读的过程中，他感觉到那些话语背后有一种强烈而真实的使命感，他觉得自己基本上懂了。

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Far from the main street, in one of the Negro sections of the town, Doctor Benedict Mady Copeland sat in his dark kitchen alone. It was past nine o’clock and the Sunday bells were silent now.Although the night was very hot, there was a small fire in the round-bellied wood stove.Doctor Copeland sat close to it, leaning forward in a straight-backed kitchen chair with his head cupped in his long, slender hands.The red glow from the chinks of the stove shone on his face—in this light his heavy lips looked almost purple against his black skin, and his gray hair, tight against his skull like a cap of lamb’s wool, took on a bluish color also.He sat motionless in this position for a long time.Even his eyes, which stared from behind the silver rims of his spectacles, did not change their fixed, somber gaze.Then he cleared his throat harshly, and picked up a book from the floor beside his chair.All around him the room was very dark, and he had to hold the book close to the stove to make out the print.Tonight he read Spinoza.He did not wholly understand the intricate play of ideas and the complex phrases, but as he read he sensed a strong, true purpose behind the words and he felt that he almost understood.

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夜晚，尖厉的门铃声经常会将他从沉寂中唤醒。他走到前厅，总会发现有骨折的病人，或者被剃刀划伤的病人。但今天晚上没有人打扰他。他在昏暗的厨房里独自坐了好几个小时，开始慢慢地左右摇晃起来，从喉咙里发出一种像唱歌一样的呻吟。他正发着这种声音，波西娅突然来了。

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Often at night the sharp jangle of the doorbell would rouse him from his silence, and in the front room he would find a patient with a broken bone or with a razor wound. But this evening he was not disturbed.And after the solitary hours spent sitting in the dark kitchen it happened that he began swaying slowly from side to side and from his throat there came a sound like a kind of singing moan.He was making this sound when Portia came.

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科普兰医生预先知道她要来。外面的大街上，他听到有人在吹口琴，吹的是一支布鲁斯歌曲，他知道那是儿子威廉吹的。他没有开灯，穿过走廊，打开了前门。他没有走到门廊去，而是站在昏暗的纱门后面。月光很亮，波西娅、威廉、海博埃的影子投在布满尘土的街道上，黑乎乎的，分外清晰。附近的房子看上去都很惨淡，科普兰医生家的房子跟附近其他的房子都不一样，它是用砖和灰泥建的，非常结实。小前院的周围围着一圈尖桩栅栏。波西娅在大门口跟丈夫和兄弟道了别，敲了敲纱门。

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Doctor Copeland knew of her arrival in advance. From the street outside he caught the sound of a harmonica playing a blues song and he knew that the music was played by William, his son.Without turning on the light he went through the hall and opened the front door.He did not step out on the porch, but stood in the dark behind the screen.The moonlight was bright and the shadows of Portia and William and Highboy lay black and solid on the dusty street.The houses in the neighborhood had a miserable look.Doctor Copeland’s house was different from any other building nearby.It was built solidly of brick and stucco.Around the small front yard there was a picket fence.Portia said good-bye to her husband and brother at the gate and knocked on the screen door.

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“你为什么这么在黑暗里坐着啊？”

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“How come you sit here in the dark like this?”

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他们一起穿过昏暗的走廊，回到厨房。

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They went together through the dark hall back to the kitchen.

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“你有豪华电灯，一直这么在黑暗里坐着，好像不正常。”

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“You haves grand electric lights. It don’t seem natural why you all the time sitting in the dark like this.”

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科普兰医生扭了一下桌子上方吊着的灯泡，房间一下子变得明亮起来。“黑暗比较适合我。”他说。

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Doctor Copeland twisted the bulb suspended over the table and the room was suddenly very bright.“The dark suits me，”he said.

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这间屋子很干净，空荡荡的。餐桌的一头放着几本书和一个墨水台——另一头有一把叉子、一个勺子，还有一个盘子。科普兰医生坐得笔直，两条大长腿叠放着。一开始，波西娅也僵硬地坐在那里。父女二人长得很像——两人的鼻子都宽而扁平，嘴巴和额头像一个模子里刻出来的。但跟父亲相比，波西娅的肤色很浅。

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The room was clean and bare. On one side of the kitchen table there were books and an ink-stand—on the other side a fork, spoon, and plate.Doctor Copeland held himself bolt upright with his long legs crossed and at first Portia sat stiffly, too.The father and daughter had a strong resemblance to each other—both of them had the same broad, flat noses, the same mouths and foreheads.But Portia’s skin was very light when compared to her Father’s.

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“这里简直烤得慌。”她说，“我觉得除了做饭，你就不要生火了。”

9

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“It sure is roasting in here，”she said.“Seems to me you would let this here fire die down except when you cooking.”

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“如果你愿意，我们可以去我的办公室。”科普兰医生说。

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“If you prefer we can go up to my office，”Doctor Copeland said.

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“我觉得还可以，不用去办公室了。”

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“I be all right, I guess. I don’t prefer.”

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科普兰医生调整了下银边眼镜，然后把两只手叠放在大腿上。“上次分开以后，你过得怎么样？你和你丈夫——还有你兄弟？”

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Doctor Copeland adjusted his silver-rimmed glasses and then folded his hands in his lap.“How have you been since we were last together?You and your husband—and your brother?”

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波西娅放松下来，把脚从帆布鞋里抽出来。“我和海博埃、威利过得很好。”

13

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Portia relaxed and slipped her feet out of her pumps.“Highboy and Willie and me gets along just fine.”

14

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“威廉还住在你们那里？”

14

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“William still boards with you?”

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“当然了。”波西娅说，“你瞧——我们有自己的生活方式，有自己的计划。海博埃——他付房租，我的钱用来买吃的，威利——他负责我们的教堂税、保险和房屋税，还有周六晚上的活动。我们仨有自己的计划，每个人都在尽一份力。”

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“Sure he do，”Portia said.“You see—us haves our own way of living and our own plan. Highboy—he pay the rent.I buys all the food out of my money.And Willie—he tends to all of our church dues, insurance, lodge dues, and Saturday Night.Us three haves our own plan and each one of us does our parts.”

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科普兰医生坐在那里，低着头，拽着自己修长的手指，直到把所有关节都拽得咔咔作响。干净的袖口垂下来盖住了他的手腕——下面是瘦削的双手，颜色好像比身上其他部位浅一些，手掌是浅黄色的。他的双手看上去干净整洁，但很干瘪，好像是用刷子刷过而且在一盆水里泡了好久似的。

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Doctor Copeland sat with his head bowed, pulling at his long fingers until he had cracked all of his joints. The clean cuffs of his sleeves hung down past his wrists—below them his thin hands seemed lighter in color than the rest of his body and the palms were soft yellow.His hands had always an immaculate, shrunken look, as though they had been scrubbed with a brush and soaked for a long time in a pan of water.

17

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“瞧，我差点忘了带来的东西。”波西娅说，“你吃过晚饭了吗？”

17

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“Here, I almost forgot what I brought，”Portia said.“Haves you had your supper yet?”

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科普兰医生说话时总是一丝不苟，每个音节似乎都是从他阴郁厚重的嘴唇里挤出来的一样。“没有，我没吃。”

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Doctor Copeland always spoke so carefully that each syllable seemed to be filtered through his sullen, heavy lips.“No, I have not eaten.”

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波西娅打开刚才放到餐桌上的那个纸袋子。“我带了好吃的羽衣甘蓝菜，觉得我们可以一起吃晚饭。我还带了一片咸肉。这些蔬菜得用咸肉来调味。用肉来炒羽衣甘蓝，你不会介意吧？”

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Portia opened a paper sack she had placed on the kitchen table.“I done brought a nice mess of collard greens and I thought maybe we have supper together. I done brought a piece of side meat, too.These here greens need to be seasoned with that.You don’t care if the collards is just cooked in meat, do you?”

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“没关系。”

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“It does not matter.”

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“你还是不吃肉吗？”

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“You still don’t eat nair meat?”

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“不吃。纯粹是个人原因，我是个素食主义者，但如果你用肉来炒甘蓝菜，也没关系。”

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“No. For purely private reasons I am a vegetarian, but it does not matter if you wish to cook the collards with a piece of meat.”

23

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波西娅没穿鞋，站在桌前仔细地择着菜。“这个地板踩起来真舒服。我不穿那双又紧又磨脚的帆布鞋，就这么到处走动，你不会介意吧？”

23

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Without putting on her shoes Portia stood at the table and carefully began to pick over the greens.“This here floor sure do feel good to my feets. You mind if I just walk around like this without putting back on them tight, hurting pumps?”

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“不会。”科普兰医生说，“没关系。”

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“No，”said Doctor Copeland.“That will be all right.”

25

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“那么——我们就吃这些美味的甘蓝菜，加玉米饼和咖啡。还有，我要从这上面切下几片肉，煎了自己吃。”

25

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“Then—us’ll have these nice collards and some hoecake and coffee. And I going to cut me off a few slices of this here white meat and fry it for myself.”

26

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科普兰医生的眼睛一直追随着波西娅。她穿着袜子慢慢地来回走动着，从墙上取下擦洗干净的锅，添了添火，又洗掉甘蓝菜上的沙土。他张了张嘴，想说话，却又把嘴闭上了。

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Doctor Copeland followed Portia with his eyes. She moved slowly around the room in her stockinged feet, taking down the scrubbed pans from the wall, building up the fire, washing the grit from the collards.He opened his mouth to speak once and then composed his lips again.

27

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“那么，你和你丈夫还有兄弟有自己的合作计划。”他终于说道。

27

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“So you and your husband and your brother have your own cooperative plan，”he said finally.

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“是的。”

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“That’s right.”

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科普兰医生使劲拉动手指，又想把关节掰响。“你们计划要孩子了吗？”

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Doctor Copeland jerked at his fingers and tried to pop the joints again.“Do you intend to plan for children?”

30

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波西娅没有看父亲，她把甘蓝菜盆里的水倒掉，有些生气。“有些事情，”她说，“我觉得完全要看上帝的意思。”

30

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Portia did not look at her father. Angrily she sloshed the water from the pan of collards.“There be some things，”she said，“that seem to me to depend entirely upon God.”

31

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他们没有再说话。波西娅把晚饭放在炉子上煮着，默默坐在那里，修长的双手无力地垂在膝盖上。科普兰医生的脑袋垂在胸前，好像睡着了一样。然而，他并没有睡着，他的脸上不时传过一阵紧张的震颤，然后他会深呼吸，调整自己的脸部。沉闷的房间里开始飘散晚饭的味道。在一片沉寂中，橱柜上面的钟表走动的声音很大，因为他们刚刚谈过的话题，所以，钟表单调的嘀嗒声像是一遍遍地在重复一个词：“孩子，孩子。”

31

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They did not say anything else. Portia left the supper to cook on the stove and sat silently with her long hands dropping down limp between her knees.Doctor Copeland’s head rested on his chest as though he slept.But he was not sleeping；now and then a nervous tremor would pass over his face.Then he would breathe deeply and compose his face again.Smells of the supper began to fill the stifling room.In the quietness the clock on top of the cupboard sounded very loud, and because of what they had just said to each other the monotonous ticking was like the word“chil-dren, chil-dren，”said over and over.

32

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他总会碰上他们当中的一个——光着屁股在地上爬，或者忙着玩弹珠游戏，或者在昏暗的大街上搂着一个女孩。这些男孩的名字都叫本尼迪克特·科普兰。但对于女孩们，则取了一些这样的名字：班尼·梅，或者马迪本，或者本尼迪恩·马迪恩。有一天，他数了数，有十多个孩子都是以他命名的。

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He was always meeting one of them—crawling naked on a floor or engaged in a game of marbles or even on a dark street with his arms around a girl. Benedict Copeland, the boys were all called.But for the girls there were such names as Benny Mae or Madyben or Benedine Madine.He had counted one day, and there were more than a dozen named for him.

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然而，他这一辈子，一直在告知、解释、劝说。你不能这样做，他经常说。他会告诉他们，为什么不能要这第六个或第五个或第九个孩子，有充足的理由。我们需要的不是更多的孩子，而是要给已经出生的孩子们更多的机会。黑人的优生优育是他一直劝说他们的内容。他会用简单的语言告诉他们，总是用同样的方式。随着一年年过去，这些话已经变成了某种愤怒的诗歌，他早已烂熟于心。

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But all his life he had told and explained and exhorted. You cannot do this, he would say.There are all reasons why this sixth or fifth or ninth child cannot be, he would tell them.It is not more children we need but more chances for the ones already on the earth.Eugenic Parenthood for the Negro Race was what he would exhort them to.He would tell them in simple words, always the same way, and with the years it came to be a sort of angry poem which he had always known by heart.

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对于任何一种新理论的发展，他都有研究，都了解。而且他经常自掏腰包，买了工具分发给病人。迄今为止，他是镇上第一个想到这些事情的医生。他会给予、解释、给予、告知。然而，即便如此，他也许每周还要接生四十次。马迪本或是班尼·梅。

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He studied and knew the development of any new theory. And from his own pocket he would distribute the devices to his patients himself.He was by far the first doctor in the town to even think of such.And he would give and explain and give and tell them.And then deliver maybe two score times a week.Madyben and Benny Mae.

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这还只是其中一点。只是一点。

35

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That was only one point. Only one.

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他这一辈子，一直知道，自己之所以做这个工作是有缘由的。他一直知道，他生来就是要教诲他的同胞。他整天背着包，挨家挨户地去跟他们讲各种各样的事情。

36

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All of his life he knew that there was a reason for his working. He always knew that he was meant to teach his people.All day he would go with his bag from house to house and on all things he would talk to them.

37

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漫长的一天结束后，他会感到一种沉重的疲惫。但到了晚上，当他打开前门时，他的疲惫便会无影无踪。家里有汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思、波西娅，有小威廉，还有黛西。

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After the long day a heavy tiredness would come in him. But in the evening when he opened the front gate the tiredness would go away.There were Hamilton and Karl Marx and Portia and little William.There was Daisy, too.

38

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波西娅拿起炉子上平底锅的盖子，用叉子搅了搅甘蓝菜。“父亲——”过了一会儿，她说。

38

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Portia took the lid from the pan on the stove and stirred the collards with a fork.“Father—”she said after a while.

39

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科普兰医生清清嗓子，朝手绢里吐了一口痰。他的声音痛苦而沙哑。“什么事？”

39

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Doctor Copeland cleared his throat and spat into a handkerchief. His voice was bitter and rough.“Yes?”

40

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“我们不要再吵了好吗？”

40

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“Less us quit this here quarreling with each other.”

41

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“我们没有吵啊。”科普兰医生说。

41

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“We were not quarreling，”said Doctor Copeland.

42

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“吵架并不需要语言。”波西娅说，“我觉得，就算我们这样坐在这里，一句话不说，似乎也总是在争吵。我就是有这种感觉。跟你说实话——每次来看你，几乎都让我筋疲力尽。所以，无论如何，我们都不要再吵了。”

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“It don’t take words to make a quarrel，”Portia said.“It look to me like us is always arguing even when we sitting perfectly quiet like this. It just this here feeling I haves.I tell you the truth—ever time I come to see you it mighty near wears me out.So less us try not to quarrel in any way no more.”

43

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“我当然也不希望吵架。如果你有这种感觉，我很抱歉，女儿。”

43

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“It is certainly not my wish to quarrel. I am sorry if you have that feeling, Daughter.”

44

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她倒了咖啡，把一杯没加糖的递给父亲，自己的那杯咖啡她加了好几勺糖。“我饿了，这个喝起来味道会很好。你喝着咖啡，我给你说说前一阵子我们发生过的一件事。现在一切都过去了，想想似乎有点可笑，但当时我们完全笑不出来。”

44

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She poured out coffee and handed one cup unsweetened to her father. In her own portion she put several spoons of sugar.“I getting hungry and this will taste good to us.Drink your coffee while I tell you something which happened to us a piece back.Now that it all over it seem a little bit funny, but we got plenty reason not to laugh too hard.”

45

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“说吧。”科普兰医生说。

45

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“Go ahead，”said Doctor Copeland.

46

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“嗯——前一阵子，镇上来了一个长相英俊、穿着体面的黑人男子。他管自己叫B.F.梅森先生，他说是从华盛顿特区来的。他每天拄着拐杖，穿着漂亮的花衬衫，在街上走来走去。到了晚上，他会去“社会咖啡馆”，吃得比镇上所有人都讲究。每天晚上，他都给自己点一瓶杜松子酒、两块猪排当晚餐。他对每个人都笑容可掬，对身边所有女孩都鞠躬致敬，进来出去时会为你拉门。也就一个星期的时间，他无论去哪里，都成为受欢迎的人。人们开始对这位富足的B.F.梅森先生充满好奇和猜测。很快，他混熟了之后，开始着手干正事了。”

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“Well—sometime back a real fine-looking, dressed-up colored man come in town here. He called hisself Mr.B.F.Mason and said he come from Washington, D.C.Ever day he would walk up and down the street with a walking-cane and a pretty colored shirt on.Then at night he would go to the Society Café.He eaten finer than any man in this town.Ever night he would order hisself a bottle of gin and two pork chops for his supper.He always had a smile for everbody and was always bowing around to the girls and holding a door open for you to come in or go out.For about a week he made hisself mighty pleasant wherever he were.Peoples begun to ask questions and wonder about this rich Mr.B.F.Mason.Then pretty soon, after he acquaints hisself, he begun to settle down to business.”

47

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波西娅噘起嘴唇，吹吹她的咖啡。“我猜，你肯定在报纸上看到过政府给老年人发养老费的事？”

47

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Portia spread out her lips and blew into her saucer of coffee.“I suppose you done read in the paper about this Government Pincher business for old folks?”

48

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科普兰医生点点头。“养老金。”他说。

48

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Doctor Copeland nodded.“Pension，”he said.

49

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“嗯——他就是跟这件事有关系。他是政府派来的，他在华盛顿特区受总统之托，到这里来让大家都加入政府的养老费计划。他挨家挨户地跟人们解释，你交一块钱定金加入这个计划，然后每周交两毛五分钱——等你到四十五岁时，政府会每个月发给你五十块钱，一直付到你死的时候。我认识的所有人听到这个都非常兴奋。每个加入的人，他都免费给一张总统的照片，下面还有总统的签名。他跟人们说，六个月以后，每人都能得到一套免费制服。这个俱乐部名字叫‘黑人养老费领取者大联盟’——两个月后，每人都会得到一条橘色绶带，上面印着G.L.P.C.P.，代表俱乐部的名字。你瞧，跟其他政府部门一样，都用这种字母缩写。他拿着这个小本本走街串巷，人们开始纷纷加入。他记下他们的名字，收了钱。每个星期六，他都去收钱。不到三个星期，这个B.F.梅森先生让很多人都加入了这个俱乐部。星期六，他都转不过来了，他不得不花钱找人替他收费，每人负责三四个街区。每个星期六一大早，我也在家附近替他收那两毛五分钱的费用。当然，威利一开始就为他、海博埃和我交钱加入了俱乐部。”

49

-

“Well—he were connected with that. He were from the government.He had to come down from the President in Washington, D.C.，to join everbody up for the Government Pinchers.He went around from one door to the next explaining how you pay one dollar down to join and after that twenty-five cents a week—and how when you were forty-five year old the government would pay you fifty dollars ever month of your life.All the peoples I know were very excited about this.He give everbody that joined a free picture of the President with his name signed under it.He told how at the end of six months there were going to be free uniforms for ever member.The club was called the Grand League of Pincheners for Colored Peoples—and at the end of two months everbody was going to get a orange ribbon with a G.L.P.C.P.on it to stand for the name.You know, like all these other letter things in the government.He come around from house to house with this little book and everbody commenced to join.He wrote their names down and took the money.Ever Saturday he would collect.In three weeks this Mr.B.F.Mason had joined up so many peoples he couldn’t get all the way around on Saturday.He have to pay somebody to take up the collections in each three four blocks.I collected early ever Saturday for near where we live and got that quarter.Course Willie had joined at the beginning for him and Highboy and me.”

50

-

“在你家附近的很多家庭里，我都见过总统的照片，记得有人提到过梅森的名字。”科普兰医生说，“他是个小偷？”

50

-

“I have come across many pictures of the President in various houses near where you live and I remember hearing the name Mason mentioned，”said Doctor Copeland.“He was a thief?”

51

-

“是的。”波西娅说，“有人开始调查这个B.F.梅森先生，然后他被逮起来了。他们发现，他就是从亚特兰大来的，连华盛顿特区和总统的影子都没有见过。他敛到的钱全都藏了起来，或者花掉了。威利白白扔掉了七块五毛钱。”

51

-

“He were，”said Portia.“Somebody begun to find out about this Mr. B.F.Mason and he were arrested.They find out he were from just plain Atlanta and hadn’t never smelled no Washington, D.C.，or no President.All the money were hid or spent.Willie had just throwed away seven dollars and fifty cents.”

52

-

科普兰医生激动起来。“我就是这个意思——”

52

-

Doctor Copeland was excited.“That is what I mean by—”

53

-

“下辈子，”波西娅说，“那个人肯定也没有好下场。但现在，一切都过去了，似乎有点好笑，但当然了，我们完全笑不出来。”

53

-

“In the hereafter，”Portia said，“that man sure going to wake up with a hot pitchfork in his gut. But now that it all over it do seem a little bit funny, but of course we got plenty reason not to laugh too hard.”

54

-

“每个周五晚上，黑人这个种族都会自愿爬上十字架。”科普兰医生说。

54

-

“The Negro race of its own accord climbs up on the cross on every Friday，”said Doctor Copeland.

55

-

波西娅的手一晃，手里的咖啡沿着杯碟流了出来，她舔着胳膊上的咖啡。“你这话是什么意思？”

55

-

Portia’s hands shook and coffee trickled down from the saucer she was holding. She licked it from her arm.“What you mean?”

56

-

“我的意思是，我总是在寻找。我的意思是，如果我能找到十个黑人——十个我的同胞——有脊梁、有脑子、有勇气的黑人，他们愿意倾尽所有——”

56

-

“I mean that I am always looking. I mean that if I could just find ten Negroes—ten of my own people—with spine and brains and courage who are willing to give all that they have—”

57

-

波西娅放下咖啡。“我们不要讨论这样的问题。”

57

-

Portia put down the coffee.“Us was not talking about anything like that.”

58

-

“只要有四个黑人，”科普兰医生说，“只要汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思、威廉，还有你，只要你们四个黑人，真正具有这些素质和骨气——”

58

-

“Only four Negroes，”said Doctor Copeland.“Only the sum of Hamilton and Karl Marx and William and you. Only four Negroes with these real true qualities and backbone—”

59

-

“威利、海博埃和我都很有骨气。”波西娅生气地说，“这是个艰难的世道，我觉得我们三个人一直奋斗得很好。”

59

-

“Willie and Highboy and me have backbone，”said Portia angrily.“This here is a hard world and it seem to me us three struggles along pretty well.”

60

-

他们沉默了一会儿。科普兰医生把眼镜放到桌上，用干瘪的手指按住眼睛。“你总是用这词——黑人，”波西娅说，“这个词会伤害人们的感情。即便原来用的‘黑鬼’也比这个强，但有礼貌的人们——无论什么肤色——总是说‘有色人种’。”

60

-

For a minute they were silent. Doctor Copeland laid his spectacles on the table and pressed his shrunken fingers to his eyeballs.

61

-

科普兰医生没有回答。

61

-

“You all the time using that word—Negro，”said Portia.“And that word haves a way of hurting people’s feelings. Even old plain nigger is better than that word.But polite peoples—no matter what shade they is—always says colored.”

62

-

“拿我和威利来说吧。我们并不完全是有色人种。我们的妈妈肤色很浅，我俩身上有很多白人血统。而海博埃——他是印第安人，身上有很大一部分印第安血统。我们都不是纯粹的有色人种，你一直用的这个词会伤害到人们的感情。”

62

-

Doctor Copeland did not answer.

63

-

“我对这些托词没兴趣。”科普兰医生说，“我只对真正的真相感兴趣。”

63

-

“Take Willie and me. Us aren’t all the way colored.Our Mama was real light and both of us haves a good deal of white folks’blood in us.And Highboy—he Indian.He got a good part Indian in him.None of us is pure colored and the word you all the time using haves a way of hurting peoples’feelings.”

64

-

“嗯，这就是真相。大家都害怕你。汉密尔顿、巴迪、威利，还有我的海博埃，他们得喝很多杜松子酒才敢到这儿来，像我一样跟你坐坐。威利说，他还是个孩子的时候便记得你这副模样，而且那时候就开始害怕自己的父亲了。”

64

-

“I am not interested in subterfuges，”said Doctor Copeland.“I am interested only in real truths.”

65

-

科普兰医生大声地咳嗽一声，清了清嗓子。

65

-

“Well, this here is a truth. Everbody is scared of you.It sure would take a whole lot of gin to get Hamilton or Buddy or Willie or my Highboy to come in this house and sit with you like I does.Willie say he remember you when he were only a little boy and he were afraid of his own father then.”

66

-

“每个人都有感情——不管是谁——如果在家里，一个人的感情必定会受到伤害，那便没人愿意到这个家里来。你也一样。我见过你的感情被白人伤害过很多次，他们都不懂这个道理。”

66

-

Doctor Copeland coughed harshly and cleared his throat.

67

-

“没有，”科普兰医生说，“你没见过我的感情受到伤害。”

67

-

“Everbody haves feelings—no matter who they is—and nobody is going to walk in no house where they certain their feelings will be hurt. You the same way.I seen your feelings injured too many times by white people not to know that.”

68

-

“当然，我知道，我和威利，还有海博埃——我们都不是文化人，但海博埃和威利都有一颗金子般的心。他们和你不一样。”

68

-

“No，”said Doctor Copeland.“You have not seen my feelings injured.”

69

-

“对。”科普兰医生说。

69

-

“Course I realize that Willie or my Highboy or me—that none of us is scholars. But Highboy and Willie is both good as gold.There just is a difference between them and you.”

70

-

“我和汉密尔顿、巴迪，还有威利——我们都不喜欢像你一样说话。我们说话像妈妈，或者她的家人，或者她的祖辈们。你用脑子思考一切，而我们更愿意用心说话，说那些在心中埋藏了很久的话，这就是一个差别。”

70

-

“Yes，”said Doctor Copeland.

71

-

“是的。”科普兰医生说。

71

-

“Hamilton or Buddy or Willie or me—none of us ever cares to talk like you. Us talk like our own Mama and her peoples and their peoples before them.You think out everything in your brain.While us rather talk from something in our hearts that has been there for a long time.That’s one of them differences.”

72

-

“人们不能抓起自己的孩子，把他们按照自己的想法变成自己想要的样子，不管这样做会不会伤害他们，也不管这样做是对还是错。你想尽办法，拼命要这样做。现在，只剩我一个人还愿意走进这个家里来，和你这样坐一坐。”

72

-

“Yes，”said Doctor Copeland.

73

-

灯光照进科普兰医生的眼睛里，特别明亮，她的声音很大，很强硬。他咳嗽一下，整张脸都颤抖起来。他想端起那杯凉了的咖啡，手却怎么都端不稳。眼泪涌上他的眼眶，他伸手去拿眼镜，想要掩饰一下。

73

-

“A person can’t pick up they children and just squeeze them to which-a-way they wants them to be. Whether it hurt them or not.Whether it right or wrong.You done tried that hard as any man could try.And now I the only one of us that would come in this here house and sit with you like this.”

74

-

波西娅看见了，赶紧起身走到他跟前。她双手抱住他的头，用面颊去贴他的前额。“我伤害了父亲的感情。”她柔声说道。

74

-

The light was very bright in Doctor Copeland’s eyes and her voice was loud and hard. He coughed and his whole face trembled.He tried to pick up the cup of cold coffee, but his hand would not hold it steadily.The tears came up to his eyes and he reached for his glasses to try to hide them.

75

-

他的声音很硬。“没有，老是说什么伤害感情，这很蠢，很幼稚。”

75

-

Portia saw and went up to him quickly. She put her arms around his head and pressed her cheek to his forehead.“I done hurt my Father’s feelings，”she said softly.

76

-

眼泪慢慢滚下他的两颊，在火光的映射下，呈现出蓝、绿、红的颜色。“真的非常抱歉。”波西娅说。

76

-

His voice was hard.“No. It is foolish and primitive to keep repeating this about hurt feelings.”

77

-

科普兰医生用棉布手绢擦着眼泪。“没关系。”

77

-

The tears went slowly down his cheek and the fire made them take on the colors of blue and green and red.“I be really and truly sorry，”said Portia.

78

-

“我们不要再吵了。我真的受不了我们之间的这种争吵。我觉得，每次在一起，我们之间似乎都会发生真的很不好的事情。我们不要再这么吵了。”

78

-

Doctor Copeland wiped his face with his cotton handkerchief.“It is all right.”

79

-

“好，”科普兰医生说，“我们不要吵了。”

79

-

“Less us not ever quarrel no more. I can’t stand this here fighting between us.It seem to me that something real bad come up in us ever time we be together.Less us never quarrel like this no more.”

80

-

波西娅抽抽鼻子，用手背抹了一下鼻子。有几分钟的时间，她站在那里，抱着父亲的头。过了一会儿，她最后擦了一下脸，走到炉子上盛着甘蓝的锅跟前。

80

-

“No，”said Doctor Copeland.“Let us not quarrel.”

81

-

“这些菜应该煮得很嫩了。”她欢快地说，“现在，我要做点好吃的小玉米饼，好搭配着吃。”

81

-

Portia sniffled and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. For a few minutes she stood with her arms around her father’s head.Then after a while she wiped her face for a final time and went over to the pot of greens on the stove.

82

-

波西娅穿着袜子，在厨房里慢慢来回忙碌着，她父亲的目光一直追随着她。有一阵子，他们又陷入了沉默。

82

-

“It mighty nigh time for these to be tender，”she said cheerfully.“Now I think I’ll start making some of them good little hoecakes to go along with them.”

83

-

他的眼里还有泪花，看东西轮廓都是模糊的。波西娅真的很像她妈妈。多年以前，黛西就是这样在厨房里走来走去，默默地忙碌着。黛西的肤色不像他这么黑——她的皮肤就像深色蜂蜜的颜色那么美。她总是很安静，很温柔，但在那种柔软的温和背后，她身上还有一种倔强。无论他多么认真地去研究，始终也无法理解妻子身上这种温柔的倔强。

83

-

Portia moved slowly around the kitchen in her stockinged feet and her father followed her with his eyes. For a while again they were silent.

84

-

他会劝告她，告诉她自己所有的想法，但她总是很温柔，却总是不肯听她的话，依旧我行我素。

84

-

With his eyes wet, so that the edges of things were blurred, Portia was truly like her mother. Years ago Daisy had walked like that around the kitchen, silent and occupied.Daisy was not black as he was—her skin had been like the beautiful color of dark honey.She was always very quiet and gentle.But beneath that soft gentleness there was something stubborn in her, and no matter how conscientiously he studied it all out, he could not understand the gentle stubbornness in his wife.

85

-

后来，有了汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思、威廉和波西娅。他对他们产生的这种真切的使命感如此强烈，他清楚地知道他们应该成为什么样的人。汉密尔顿要成为一名伟大的科学家；卡尔·马克思要成为一名黑人教师；威廉要成为一名律师，为正义而战；而波西娅要成为一名医生，专门为妇女儿童治病。

85

-

He would exhort her and he would tell her all that was in his heart and still she was gentle. And still she would not listen to him but would go on her own way.

86

-

他们还是婴儿时，他就跟他们讲将来要从肩头卸下的枷锁——顺从和懒惰的枷锁。等他们长大一点，他再三跟他们强调，世上没有上帝，但他们的生命是神圣的，每个人都有真正的使命。他会一遍遍地跟他们说这些，他们挤在一起，坐得离他远远的，瞪着大大的黑人孩子的眼睛，望着他们的母亲。而黛西坐在那里，根本不听他说话，一如既往地温柔，却又倔强。

86

-

Then later there were Hamilton and Karl Marx and William and Portia. And this feeling of real true purpose for them was so strong that he knew exactly how each thing should be with them.Hamilton would be a great scientist and Karl Marx a teacher of the Negro race and William a lawyer to fight against injustice and Portia a doctor for women and children.

87

-

因为汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思、威廉和波西娅都有各自真正的使命，所以，他知道每一个细节都应该如何去做。每年秋天，他总是把他们都带到镇上去，给他们买漂亮的黑鞋子、黑袜子。他给波西娅买黑羊毛衣料做裙子，白色亚麻布做领子和袖口；给男孩们买黑羊毛衣料做裤子，上好的白色亚麻布做衬衫。他不让他们穿颜色鲜亮的劣质衣服，但他们上学时，恰恰希望穿这样的衣服。黛西说，他们都觉得很难堪，说他是个强硬的父亲。他知道这个家应该是什么样子。家里不能有花哨的东西——不要俗气的日历、蕾丝枕头，不要小摆设——家里每一样东西都应该是朴素的、深色的，都应该象征工作和真正的使命感。

87

-

And when they were even babies he would tell them of the yoke they must thrust from their shoulders—the yoke of submission and slothfulness. And when they were a little older he would impress upon them that there was no God, but that their lives were holy and for each one of them there was this real true purpose.He would tell it to them over and over, and they would sit together far away from him and look with their big Negro-children eyes at their mother.And Daisy would sit without listening, gentle and stubborn.

88

-

一天晚上，他发现黛西给小波西娅扎了耳朵眼儿要戴耳环。还有一次，他回家后发现壁炉台上有个穿着羽毛裙的丘比特娃娃，黛西温柔却强硬，不肯把娃娃扔掉。他还知道，黛西在教孩子们要温顺。她给孩子们讲地狱和天堂，还让他们相信有鬼魂，有闹鬼的地方。黛西每周六都去教堂，会很伤心地跟牧师讲她丈夫的事情。她每次都倔强地带着孩子们一起去教堂，孩子们对她言听计从。

88

-

Because of the true purpose for Hamilton, Karl Marx, William, and Portia, he knew how every detail should be. In the autumn of each year he took them all into town and bought for them good black shoes and black stockings.For Portia he bought black woolen material for dresses and white linen for collars and cuffs.For the boys there was black wool for trousers and fine white linen for shirts.He did not want them to wear bright-colored, flimsy clothes.But when they went to school those were the ones they wished to wear, and Daisy said that they were embarrassed and that he was a hard father.He knew how the house should be.There could be no fanciness—no gaudy calendars or lace pillows or knick-knacks—but everything in the house must be plain and dark and indicative of work and the real true purpose.

89

-

整个黑人种族都病了，他整天忙碌，有时要忙到半夜。漫长的一天结束后，他身心疲惫，但他推开家里的前门时，这种疲惫会一扫而空。然而，等他真的走进屋门，往往会发现，威廉在梳子上包了卫生纸，正在用梳子弹奏音乐，汉密尔顿和卡尔·马克思正在掷骰子赌午饭钱，而波西娅正在跟妈妈一起笑。

89

-

Then one night he found that Daisy had pierced holes in little Portia’s ears for earrings. And another time a kewpie doll with feather skirts was on the mantelpiece when he came home, and Daisy was gentle and hard and would not put it away.He knew, too, that Daisy was teaching the children the cult of meekness.She told them about hell and heaven.Also she convinced them of ghosts and of haunted places.Daisy went to church every Sunday and she talked sorrowfully to the preacher of her own husband.And with her stubbornness she always took the children to the church, too, and they listened.

90

-

他会带着他们重新来一次，却换了别的方式。他总是拿出他们的功课，跟他们谈话，而他们则会紧紧靠在一起，坐在那里，眼睛望着母亲。他会说啊说啊，但他们根本不想听。

90

-

The whole Negro race was sick, and he was busy all the day and sometimes half the night. After the long day a great weariness would come in him, but when he opened the front gate of his home the weariness would go away.Yet when he went into the house William would be playing music on a comb wrapped in toilet paper, Hamilton and Karl Marx would be shooting craps for their lunch money, Portia would be laughing with her mother.

91

-

他的心头涌上一种沮丧、可怕的黑人式的感觉。他会到办公室里，尽量坐在那里，看报，思考，直到平静下来，然后重新开始。他拉下房间的百叶窗，这样只剩下明亮的灯光、书，还有思考的感觉。但有些时候，他久久不能平静。他还年轻，单靠学习无法赶走那种可怕的感觉。

91

-

He would start all over with them, but in a different way. He would bring out their lessons and talk with them.They would sit close together and look at their mother.He would talk and talk, but none of them wanted to understand.

92

-

汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思、威廉、波西娅都很怕他，他们会望着自己的母亲——有时候，当他意识到这一点时，那种沮丧的感觉会让他难以承受，不清楚自己到底做了什么。

92

-

The feeling that would come on him was a black, terrible Negro feeling. He would try to sit in his office and read and meditate until he could be calm and start again.He would pull down the shades of the room so that there would be only the bright light and the books and the feeling of meditation.But sometimes this calmness would not come.He was young, and the terrible feeling would not go away with study.

93

-

他无法阻止那种可怕的感觉，过后自己又完全无法理解。

93

-

Hamilton, Karl Marx, William, and Portia would be afraid of him and look at their mother—and sometimes when he realized this the black feeling would conquer him and he knew not what he did.

94

-

“我觉得这顿晚饭肯定味道鲜美。”波西娅说，“我想，我们现在就开始吃吧，海博埃和威利随时都可能进来。”

94

-

He could not stop those terrible things, and afterward he could never understand.

95

-

科普兰医生放好眼镜，把椅子朝前拖了拖。“今晚你丈夫和威廉去哪儿玩了？”

95

-

“This here supper sure smells good to me，”said Portia.“I expect us better eat now because Highboy and Willie liable to come trooping in any minute.”

96

-

“他们扔马蹄铁去了。那个雷蒙德·琼斯在后院有个扔马蹄铁的地方，雷蒙德和他妹妹拉芙·琼斯每天晚上都玩。拉芙这姑娘很丑，海博埃和威廉想到她家玩，随时都可以去，我不介意。但他们说，九点四十五会来接我，现在他们随时都可能会来。”

96

-

Doctor Copeland settled his spectacles and pulled his chair up to the table.“Where have your husband and William been spending the evening?”

97

-

“趁我还记得，”科普兰医生说，“我想，你经常能收到汉密尔顿和卡尔·马克思的信吧。”

97

-

“They been throwing horseshoes. This here Raymond Jones haves a horseshoe place in his back yard.This Raymond and his sister, Love Jones, plays ever night.Love is such a ugly girl I don’t mind about Highboy or Willie going around to their house any time they wishes.But they said they would come back for me at quarter to ten and I expecting them now any minute.”

98

-

“我的确经常收到汉密尔顿的信，实际上，他接管了外公家所有的活儿。但巴迪，他去了莫比尔——你知道，他不大喜欢写信。但巴迪容易跟人相处，我并不担心他，他这样的人总会混得很好。”

98

-

“Before I forget，”said Doctor Copeland.“I suppose you hear frequently from Hamilton and Karl Marx.”

99

-

他们默默地坐在桌前，吃着晚饭。波西娅不断抬头看壁橱上的表，海博埃和威利该来了。科普兰医生只是低头吃饭，他手里拿着叉子，好像这叉子很沉，他的手指都哆嗦了。眼前的食物，他只是尝了尝，每一口都难以下咽。空气中有种紧张的感觉，他们俩好像都努力要想出些话来说。

99

-

“I does from Hamilton. He practically taken over all the work on our Grandpapa’s place.But Buddy, he in Mobile—and you know he were never a big hand at writing letters.However, Buddy always haves such a sweet way with peoples that I don’t ever worry concerning him.He the kind to always get along right well.”

100

-

科普兰医生不知道如何开口。有时候，他觉得以前跟孩子们说得太多了，他们几乎都听不懂，所以现在也就无话可说了。过了一会儿，他用手帕擦擦嘴，开口了，声音有些迟疑。

100

-

They sat silently at the table before the supper. Portia kept looking up at the clock on the cupboard because it was time for Highboy and Willie to come.Doctor Copeland bent his head over the plate.He held the fork in his hand as though it were heavy, and his fingers trembled.He only tasted the food and with each mouthful he swallowed hard.There was a feeling of strain, and it seemed as though both of them wanted to keep up some conversation.

101

-

“你几乎没提你自己。跟我说说你的工作，还有最近你在做什么。”

101

-

Doctor Copeland did not know how to begin. Sometimes he thought that he had talked so much in the years before to his children and they had understood so little that now there was nothing at all to say.After a while he wiped his mouth with his handkerchief and spoke in an uncertain voice.

102

-

“我当然还是在凯利家干活儿。”波西娅说，“但听我说，父亲，我不知道还能在他们家干多久。这份工作很难做，总是得花很长时间才能做完。但这个我倒不担心，我担心的是工资。我应该每周拿三块钱——但有时候，凯利夫人总会少发给我五毛钱，或者一块钱。当然，她总是会尽快补上，但这总让我手头比较紧。”

102

-

“You have hardly mentioned yourself. Tell me about your job and what you have been doing lately.”

103

-

“这样不对。”科普兰医生说，“你为什么要忍着啊？”

103

-

“Course I still with the Kellys，”said Portia.“But I tells you, Father, I don’t know how long I going to be able to keep on with them. The work is hard and it always take me a long time to get through.However, that don’t bother me none.It about the pay I worries about.I suppose to get three dollars a week—but sometimes Mrs.Kelly likes a dollar or fifty cents of paying me the full amount.Course she always catches up on it soon as she able.But it haves a way of leaving me in a pinch.”

104

-

“这也不是她的错，她实在没办法。”波西娅说，“家里有一半房客不付房租，要想维持日常生活，又需要大笔开支。跟你说实话——凯利家离摊上官司不远了，他们的日子过得很艰难。”

104

-

“That is not right，”said Doctor Copeland.“Why do you stand for it?”

105

-

“你可以找点别的工作。”

105

-

“It ain’t her fault. She can’t help it，”said Portia.“Half the folks in that house don’t pay the rent, and it a big expense to keep everything up.I tell you the truth—the Kellys is just barely keeping one jump ahead of the sheriff.They having a mighty hard time.”

106

-

“我知道。但凯利一家真的是特别好的白人雇主，我真的非常喜欢他们。那三个小孩就像我自己的家人，我感觉巴伯还有那个小婴儿都像是我养大的。尽管我和米克在一起总是有这样那样的争吵，但我对她也真有一种亲密感。”

106

-

“There ought to be some other job you can get.”

107

-

“但你得为自己考虑考虑。”科普兰医生说。

107

-

“I know. But the Kellys is really grand white peoples to work for.I really fond of them as I can be.Them three little children is just like some of my own kinfolks.I feel like I done really raised Bubber and the baby.And although Mick and me is always getting into some kind of quarrel together, I haves a real close fondness for her, too.”

108

-

“米克现在——”波西娅说，“她真是个问题，没人知道该怎么管教这个孩子，她又自负又任性，一天到晚脑子里也不知道在想什么。对这个孩子，我有一种很好笑的感觉。我觉得她好像总有一天要搞出个大意外，但到底是好意外还是坏意外，我不知道。有时候，米克让我很困惑，但我仍然很喜欢她。”

108

-

“But you must think of yourself，”said Doctor Copeland.

109

-

“你得先解决自己的生计问题才行。”

109

-

“Mick, now—”said Portia.“She a real case. Not a soul know how to manage that child.She just as biggity and headstrong as she can be.Something going on in her all the time.I haves a funny feeling about that child.It seem to me that one of these days she going to really surprise somebody.But whether that going to be a good surprise or a bad surprise I just don’t know.Mick puzzles me sometimes.But still I really fond of her.”

110

-

“我刚才说了，这不是凯利太太的错，维护那么大一幢老房子要花很多钱，房租又收不上来。房客里，只有一个人付得起一笔可观的房租，这个人总是按时付，从来没有拖欠过。他才刚刚来这里住了一阵子，是个聋哑人，是我近距离见过的第一个聋哑人——但他是个非常好的白人。”

110

-

“You must look out for your own livelihood first.”

111

-

“又高又瘦，眼睛是灰绿色的？”科普兰医生突然问道，“而且对所有人都非常礼貌，穿得非常得体？不像镇上的当地人——更像北方人，或者也许是个犹太人？”

111

-

“As I say, it ain’t Mrs. Kelly’s fault.It costs so much to run that big old house and the rent just don’t be paid.Ain’t but one person in the house who pay a decent amount for his room and pay it on the dot without fail.And that man only been living there a short while.He one of these here deaf-and-dumb folks.He the first one of them I ever seen close up—but he a mighty fine white man.”

112

-

“就是他。”波西娅说。

112

-

“Tall, thin, with gray and green eyes?”asked Doctor Copeland suddenly.“And always polite to everyone and very well dressed?Not like someone from this town—more like a Northerner or maybe a Jew?”

113

-

科普兰医生的脸上现出一丝急切的神情。他把玉米饼掰碎，放进盘子里的甘蓝菜汤里，开始吃起来，恢复了胃口。“我有一个聋哑人病人。”他说。

113

-

“That him，”said Portia.

114

-

“你怎么认识辛格先生的？”波西娅问。

114

-

Eagerness came into Doctor Copeland’s face. He crumbled his hoecake into the collard juice in his plate and began to eat with a new appetite.“I have a deaf-mute patient，”he said.

115

-

科普兰医生咳了一下，用手绢捂住嘴巴。“我只是见过他几次。”

115

-

“How come you acquainted with Mr. Singer?”asked Portia.

116

-

“我最好收拾下这里。”波西娅说，“威利和我的海博埃肯定要来了。但这里有这么好的洗碗池和自来水，我一眨眼工夫就可以把这些小盘子洗好了。”

116

-

Doctor Copeland coughed and covered his mouth with his handkerchief.“I have just seen him several times.”

117

-

多年以来，他一直想从脑子里摆脱掉白人那种无言的傲慢无礼这件事。那种愤懑涌上来的时候，他会跑去思考或学习。走在大街上，在白人面前，他总会在脸上保持尊严，一直沉默着。年轻时，他是“孩子”——但现在，他是“大叔”。“大叔，跑到街角那个加油站，给我找个机修工来。”不久之前，一个开车的白人男子从车里大声对他喊道。“孩子，帮我干这个。”——“大叔，干那个。”他根本不听，只自顾继续走路，一言不发，心里涌上一种尊严感。

117

-

“I better clean up now，”said Portia.“It sure enough time for Willie and my Highboy. But with this here real sink and grand running water these little dishes won’t take me two winks.”

118

-

几天前的一个晚上，一个白人酒鬼走到他跟前，开始拽着他在街上走。他背着包，以为肯定有人受伤了。但这个酒鬼把他拖进了一家白人餐馆，柜台前的白人男子们开始傲慢地大喊大叫起来。他知道这个酒鬼在耍弄他，即便那个时候，他也没有丢掉自己的尊严。

118

-

The quiet insolence of the white race was one thing he had tried to keep out of his mind for years. When the resentment would come to him he would cogitate and study.In the streets and around white people he would keep the dignity on his face and always be silent.When he was younger it was“Boy”—but now it was“Uncle.”“Uncle, run down to that filling station on the corner and send me a mechanic.”A white man in a car had called out those words to him not long ago.“Boy, give me a hand with this.”—“Uncle, do that.”And he would not listen, but would walk, on with the dignity in him and be silent.

119

-

但他和这个又高又瘦、长着灰绿色眼睛的白人男子发生过一次交集，这是以前跟任何白人都没有过的事情。

119

-

A few nights ago a drunken white man had come up to him and begun pulling him along the street. He had his bag with him and he was sure someone was hurt.But the drunkard had pulled him into a white man’s restaurant and the white men at the counter had begun hollering out with their insolence.He knew that the drunkard was making fun of him.Even then he had kept the dignity in him.

120

-

这件事发生在几周前一个漆黑的雨夜。他刚看完一个产妇的病例，冒雨站在街角。他想点根烟，但接连划了好几根火柴，却都熄灭了。他站在那里，嘴里叼着没点火的烟，就在这时一个白人走上前来，举着一根点着的火柴给他。在夜色中，两人借着火苗看清了彼此的面容。白人冲他笑笑，给他点上了烟。他不知道该说什么，因为以前从来没碰上过这种事情。

120

-

But with this tall, thin white man with the gray-green eyes something had happened that had never happened to him with any white man before.

121

-

他俩一起在街角站了几分钟，然后白人递给他一张名片。他想跟白人说话，问他几个问题，但他不敢肯定对方是否能够真正听懂。因为白人种族一贯傲慢无礼，所以他很害怕因主动示好而丧失掉自己的尊严。

121

-

It came about on a dark, rainy night several weeks ago. He had just come from a maternity case and was standing in the rain on a corner.He had tried to light a cigarette and one by one the matches in his box fizzled out.He had been standing with the unlighted cigarette in his mouth when the white man stepped up and held for him a lighted match.In the dark with the flame between them they could see each other’s faces.The white man smiled at him and lighted for him his cigarette.He did not know what to say, for nothing like that had ever happened to him before.

122

-

但是，这个白人给他点烟，冲他微笑，而且似乎想跟他一起相处。从那之后，他把这件事情仔细琢磨了很多遍。

122

-

They had stood for a few minutes on the street corner together, and then the white man had handed him his card. He wanted to talk to the white man and ask him some questions, but he did not know for sure if he could really understand.Because of the insolence of all the white race he was afraid to lose his dignity in friendliness.

123

-

“我有个聋哑病人，”科普兰医生对波西娅说，“是个五岁的小男孩。不知为什么，我总觉得自己要为他的残疾负责任。我给他接的生，后来又回访过两次，之后自然就把他忘了。他后来耳朵有了毛病，但他母亲没有留意他耳朵里流出来的分泌物，也没把他带来看病。等我最后注意到的时候，已经太晚了。当然，他什么都听不见了，后来自然也不会说话。但我曾经仔细观察过他，我觉得如果他身体没有残疾的话，很有可能是个非常聪明的孩子。”

123

-

But the white man had lighted his cigarette and smiled and seemed to want to be with him. Since then he had thought this over many times.

124

-

“你总是对孩子特别感兴趣。”波西娅说，“你对孩子比对大人还关心，对吗？”

124

-

“I have a deaf-mute patient，”said Doctor Copeland to Portia.“The patient is a boy five years of age. And somehow I cannot get over the feeling that I am to blame for his handicap.I delivered him, and after two post-delivery visits of course I forgot about him.He developed ear trouble, but the mother paid no attention to the discharges from his ears and did not bring him to me.When it was finally brought to my attention it was too late.Of course he hears nothing and of course he therefore cannot speak.But I have watched him carefully, and it seems to me that if he were normal he would be a very intelligent child.”

125

-

“孩子身上总是有更多希望。”科普兰医生说，“但这个失聪的男孩——我一直想打听，看是不是有什么机构可以接收他。”

125

-

“You always had a great interest in little children，”said Portia.“You care a heap more about them than about grown peoples, don’t you?”

126

-

“辛格先生可以告诉你。他真的是个善良的白人，一点都不傲慢。”

126

-

“There is more hope in the young child，”said Doctor Copeland.“But this deaf boy—I have been meaning to make inquiries and find if there is some institution that would take him.”

127

-

“我不知道——”科普兰医生说，“有一两次，我曾想过给他写个便条，看看他能否给我点信息。”

127

-

“Mr. Singer would tell you.He a truly kind white man and he not a bit biggity.”

128

-

“如果我是你，肯定会写的。你特别会写信，我会帮你转交给辛格先生。”波西娅说，“两三个星期之前，他下楼到厨房来找我，拿了几件衬衫，想让我替他洗洗。那些衬衫非常干净，就像施洗者圣约翰自己穿的一样。我只需要把他们浸到温水里，稍微刷刷领子，然后烫平整就可以了。但那天晚上，我把五件干净衬衫送到楼上他房间的时候，你知道他给了我多少钱吗？”

128

-

“I do not know—”said Doctor Copeland.“I have thought once or twice about writing him a note and seeing if he could give me information.”

129

-

“不知道。”

129

-

“Sure I would if I was you. You a grand letter-writer and I would give it to Mr.Singer for you，”said Portia.“He come down in the kitchen two-three weeks ago with a few shirts he wanted me to rinch out for him.Them shirts were no more dirty than if Saint John the Baptist hisself had been wearing them.All I had to do were dip them in warm water and give the collars a small rub and press them.But that night when I taken them five clean shirts up to his room you know how much he give me?”

130

-

“他像往常一样满脸笑容，然后给了我一块钱。就那么几件衬衫，给了我整整一块钱。他真是个特别善良、特别好的白人，有任何问题，我都敢去问他。我甚至都想自己给这个善良的白人写封信。如果你想写的话，爸爸，赶紧去写吧。”

130

-

“No.”

131

-

“也许我会写的。”科普兰医生说。

131

-

“He smile like he always do and hand over to me a dollar. A whole dollar just for them little shirts.He one really kind and pleasant white man and I wouldn’t be afraid to ask him any question.I wouldn’t even mind writing that nice white man a letter myself.You go right ahead and do it, Father, if you wants to.”

132

-

波西娅突然坐起身，开始收拾自己浓密油亮的头发。微弱的口琴声传过来，慢慢地声音越来越大。“威利和海博埃来了。”波西娅说，“现在，我得出去找他们了。你自己照顾好自己，如果需要我做什么，给我捎个信儿。我今天非常高兴跟你一起吃晚饭，一起聊天。”

132

-

“Perhaps I will，”said Doctor Copeland.

133

-

这会儿，口琴声已经非常清晰了。他们能听出来，威利是一边在前门等着，一边吹口琴。

133

-

Portia sat up suddenly and began arranging her tight, oily hair. There was the faint sound of a harmonica and then gradually the music grew louder.“Here come Willie and Highboy，”Portia said.“I got to go out now and meet them.You take care of yourself now, and send me a word if you needs me for anything.I did enjoy the supper with you and the talking very much.”

134

-

“等会儿。”科普兰医生说，“你丈夫跟你在一块儿的时候，我只见过两次，我觉得我们俩还没有正式认识过，威廉也已经三年没来看他父亲了。为什么不让他们进来坐一会儿呢？”

134

-

The music from the harmonica was very clear now, and they could tell that Willie was playing while he waited at the front gate.

135

-

波西娅站在门口，摸着头发和耳环。

135

-

“Wait a minute，”said Doctor Copeland.“I have only seen your husband with you about two times and I believe we have never really met each other. And it has been three years since William has visited his father.Why not tell them to drop in for a little while?”

136

-

“威利上次来这里的时候，你伤害了他的感情。你知道，你就是不理解怎么——”

136

-

Portia stood in the doorway, fingering her hair and her earrings.

137

-

“好吧。”科普兰医生说，“我只提个建议。”

137

-

“Last time Willie come in here you hurted his feelings. You see you don’t understand just how—”

138

-

“等等。”波西娅说，“我去叫他们，我现在就去邀请他俩进来。”

138

-

“Very well，”said Doctor Copeland.“It was only a suggestion.”

139

-

科普兰医生点上一根烟，在房间里来回地踱步。他的眼镜怎么都扶不正，手指一直在哆嗦。前院传来低低的说话声，接着走廊里响起沉重的脚步声，波西娅、威廉和海博埃走进了厨房。

139

-

“Wait，”said Portia.“I going to call them. I going to invite them in right now.”

140

-

“我们来了。”波西娅说，“海博埃，我觉得你和我父亲还没有正式认识过，但你们彼此都知道对方是谁。”

140

-

Doctor Copeland lighted a cigarette and walked up and down the room. He could not straighten his glasses to just the right position and his fingers kept trembling.From the front yard there was the sound of low voices.Then heavy footsteps were in the hall and Portia, William, and Highboy entered the kitchen.

141

-

科普兰医生跟两人握了握手。威利腼腆地向后靠在墙上，但海博埃上前一步，非常正式地鞠了一躬。“我经常听说很多关于您的事情。”他说，“很高兴认识您。”

141

-

“Here we is，”said Portia.“Highboy, I don’t believe you and my Father has ever truly been introduced to each other. But you knows who each other is.”

142

-

波西娅和科普兰医生从走廊里搬来椅子，四个人围坐在火炉旁。他们一言不发，都不自在。威利紧张地盯着屋子四周——盯着厨房餐桌上的书、水槽、墙边的小床，还有他父亲。海博埃咧嘴笑着，拽着他的领带。科普兰医生似乎要说话，但舔舔嘴唇，又沉默了。

142

-

Doctor Copeland shook hands with both of them. Willie hung back shyly against the wall, but Highboy stepped forward and bowed formally.“I has always heard so much about you，”he said.“I be very pleased to make your acquaintance.”

143

-

“威利，你口琴吹得很不错了。”终于，波西娅说话了，“我看，你和海博埃一定是掉到什么人的杜松子酒瓶里去了。”

143

-

Portia and Doctor Copeland brought in chairs from the hall and the four of them sat around the stove. They were silent and uneasy.Willie gazed nervously around the room—at the books on the kitchen table, the sink, the cot against the wall, and at his father.Highboy grinned and picked at his tie.Doctor Copeland seemed about to speak, and then he wet his lips and was still silent.

144

-

“没有，夫人。”海博埃非常礼貌地说，“自从星期六以来，我俩什么酒都没喝过。我们俩玩马蹄铁游戏去了。”

144

-

“Willie, you were going pretty good with your harp，”said Portia finally.“Look to me like you and Highboy must of got into somebody’s gin bottle.”

145

-

科普兰医生仍然沉默着，他们都不断地瞥他一眼，等待着。屋子很小，这种沉默让所有人都很紧张。

145

-

“No, ma’am，”said Highboy very politely.“Us haven’t had anything since Saturday. Us have just been enjoying our horseshoe game.”

146

-

“这俩小伙子的衣服洗起来真的让我很费劲。”波西娅说，“我每个星期六都要洗他们的白西装，每周还要熨烫两次。现在，看看他俩。当然，除了下班休息的时候，他们其他时间也不穿白西装。但只穿两天，白西装就会变成黑的。我昨晚刚给他俩熨烫了裤子，看现在，一点褶痕都没了。”

146

-

Doctor Copeland still did not speak, and they all kept glancing at him and waiting. The room was close and the quietness made everyone nervous.

147

-

科普兰医生依然一言不发，他的目光停留在儿子脸上。威利注意到时，咬着自己粗糙迟钝的手指头，只顾盯着自己的脚面。科普兰医生感觉到手腕和太阳穴的脉搏怦怦直跳。他咳嗽起来，握紧一只拳头放到胸口。他想跟儿子说话，却想不出该说什么。那种熟悉的心酸痛苦又涌上心头，他没有时间认真思考和强压下去。他的脉搏怦怦直跳，他很困惑。但他们都望着他，这种沉默太压抑了，他必须开口说话。

147

-

“I do haves the hardest time with them boys’clothes，”Portia said.“I washes both of them white suits ever Saturday and I presses them twice a week. And look at them now.Course they don’t wear them except when they gets home from work.But after two days they seems to be potty black.I ironed them pants just last night and now there not a crease left.”

148

-

他的声音很高，听上去好像不是他发出来的。“威廉，不知道小时候我跟你说过的那些话，你还记得多少。”

148

-

Still Doctor Copeland was silent. He kept his eyes on his son’s face, but when Willie noticed this he bit his rough, blunt fingers and stared at his feet.Doctor Copeland felt his pulse hammering at his wrists and temples.He coughed and held his fist to his chest.He wanted to speak to his son, but he could think of nothing to say.The old bitterness came up in him and he did not have time to cogitate and push it down.His pulse hammered in him and he was confused.But they all looked at him, and the silence was so strong that he had to speak.

149

-

“我不明白你的意——意——意思。”威利说。

149

-

His voice was high and it did not sound as though it came from himself.“William, I wonder how much of all the things I have said to you when you were a child have stayed in your mind.”

150

-

科普兰医生还没弄清楚自己说的什么，那些话便脱口而出。“我的意思是，我对你、汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思付出了我的全部，我把所有的信任和希望都寄托在你们身上，而我得到的只有误解、懒散和冷漠。我为你们付出了那么多，却什么都没得到。我一无所有。我曾经努力要做的一切——”

150

-

“I don’t know what you m-m-means，”Willie said.

151

-

“嘘，”波西娅说，“爸爸，你跟我保证过，我们不会再吵了。这简直是疯了，我们再也经不起吵架了。”

151

-

The words came before Doctor Copeland knew what he would say.“I mean that to you and Hamilton and Karl Marx I gave all that was in me. And I put all of my trust and hope in you.And all I get is blank misunderstanding and idleness and indifference.Of all I have put in nothing has remained.All has been taken away from me.All that I have tried to do—”

152

-

波西娅站起身，朝前门走去，威利和海博埃立刻跟了上去。最后，科普兰医生也走了过来。

152

-

“Hush，”said Portia.“Father, you promised me that us would not quarrel. This here is crazy.Us can’t afford to quarrel.”

153

-

他们摸黑站在前门口。科普兰医生想要说话，但声音似乎埋在了心底的什么地方，发不出来。威利、波西娅和海博埃紧紧站在一起。

153

-

Portia got up and started toward the front door. Willie and Highboy followed quickly.Doctor Copeland was the last to come.

154

-

波西娅朝丈夫和兄弟伸出一只手，又朝科普兰医生伸出另一只手。“离开前，我们和解吧。我们在这里争吵，真让我受不了。我们再也经不起争吵了。”

154

-

They stood in the dark before the front door. Doctor Copeland tried to speak, but his voice seemed lost somewhere deep inside him.Willie and Portia and Highboy stood in a group together.

155

-

科普兰医生默默地又跟他俩分别握手。“很抱歉。”他说。

155

-

With one arm Portia held to her husband and brother and with the other she reached out to Doctor Copeland.“Less us all make up now before us goes. I can’t stand this here fighting between us.Less us not ever quarrel no more.”

156

-

“我没关系。”海博埃礼貌地说道。

156

-

In silence Doctor Copeland shook hands again with each of them.“I am sorry，”he said.

157

-

“我也没关系。”威利含糊地说。

157

-

“It quite all right with me，”said Highboy politely.

158

-

波西娅把他们的手都拉到一起。“我们再也经不起争吵了。”

158

-

“It quite all right with me too，”Willie mumbled.

159

-

他们道了别，科普兰医生站在漆黑的门廊上，望着他们一起沿着大街走远了。

159

-

Portia held all of their hands together.“Us just can’t afford to quarrel.”

160

-

他们远去时，脚步发出孤独的声音，让他觉得虚弱而又疲惫。等他们走出一个街区，威廉又开始吹起了口琴。音乐声既悲伤又空虚。他待在门廊里，直到再也看不见他们，听不见他们的声音。

160

-

They said good-bye, and Doctor Copeland watched them from the dark front porch as they went together up the street. Their footsteps as they walked away had a lonesome sound and he felt weak and tired.When they were a block away William began playing his harmonica again.The music was sad and empty.He stayed on the front porch until he could neither see nor hear them any longer.

161

-

科普兰医生关掉家里的电灯，在黑暗中坐在火炉前，但他无法平静下来。他想要把汉密尔顿、卡尔·马克思和威廉都从脑子里赶出去。波西娅跟他说过的每一个字又重新回荡在他的脑海中，声音很大，很强硬。他突然站起身来，打开灯，走到桌前坐下，拿过斯宾诺莎、威廉·莎士比亚和卡尔·马克思的书。他大声读着斯宾诺莎的书，那些词发出一种丰富、黑暗的声音。

161

-

Doctor Copeland turned off the lights in his house and sat in the dark before the stove. But peace would not come to him.He wanted to remove Hamilton and Karl Marx and William from his mind.Each word that Portia had said to him came back in a loud, hard way to his memory.He got up suddenly and turned on the light.He settled himself at the table with his books by Spinoza and William Shakespeare and Karl Marx.When he read the Spinoza aloud to himself the words had a rich, dark sound.

162

-

他想起刚才谈到的那个白人。如果那个白人能够帮帮那个失聪的病人奥古斯塔斯·本尼迪克特·马迪·路易斯，那该多好。即便没有这个理由，没有这些问题问他，给这个白人写封信也是好事。科普兰医生双手捧着头，喉咙里发出一种奇怪的声音，像一首呻吟的歌。他想起那个雨夜，想起那个白人在昏黄的火柴光焰后面微笑着的面容——他平静下来。

162

-

He thought of the white man of whom they had spoken. It would be good if the white man could help him with Augustus Benedict Mady Lewis, the deaf patient.It would be good to write to the white man even if he did not have this reason and these questions to ask.Doctor Copeland held his head in his hands and from his throat there came the strange sound like a kind of singing moan.He remembered the white man’s face when he smiled behind the yellow match flame on that rainy night—and peace was in him.

	past [pɑːst]	a. 过去的;
	chink [tʃɪŋk]	n.裂缝;漏洞;硬币;叮当声;(贬)中国人
	wool [wʊl]	n.羊毛;绒线
	motionless ['məʊʃnləs]	adj.不动的;静止的
	spectacle ['spektəkl]	n.景象;场面;奇观;壮观;公开展示;表相，假相
	pick [pɪkt]	采摘，挑选；
	wholly ['həʊlli]	adv.完全地;全部地;一概
	felted ['feltɪd]	v. 把 ... 制成毡(使 ... 粘结)
	razor ['reɪzə(r)]	n.剃刀
	sway [sweɪ]	v.摇动;摇摆;支配;影响;说服，使相信
	dusty ['dʌsti]	adj.满是灰尘的
	miserable ['mɪzrəbl]	adj.痛苦的;悲惨的;贫乏的;狼狈的
	upright ['ʌpraɪt]	adj.直立的;垂直的;正直的
	lodge [lɒdʒ]	n.小屋;巢穴;门房;传达室;支部
	cuff [kʌf]	n.袖口;手铐
	scrub [skrʌb]	n.用力擦洗;矮树;渺小之物
	supper ['sʌpə(r)]	n.晚饭
	sullen ['sʌlən]	adj.愠怒的;闷闷不乐的;阴沉的
	vegetarian [ˌvedʒə'teəriən]	n.素食者
	hoecake ['həʊˌkeɪk]	n.玉米饼
	stockinged [s'tɒkɪŋd]	穿袜的
	grit [ɡrɪt]	n.砂砾;粗砂石;勇气;决心
	jerk [dʒɜːk]	v.急动;猛拉
	Angrily ['æŋɡrəli]	adv.气愤地
	slosh [slɒʃ]	v.泼溅;搅动;在泥中荡;(液体)晃动作响
	tremor ['tremə(r)]	n.震动;颤动;战栗;兴奋;地震
	stifle ['staɪfl]	vt.使窒息;扼杀;扑灭;抑制
	Benny ['benɪ]	n. 安非他明药片; 兴奋剂
	exhort [ɪɡ'zɔːt]	vt.劝诫;忠告;勉励
	Hamilton ['hæmɪltən]	汉密尔顿
	handkerchief ['hæŋkətʃɪf]	n.手帕;方巾;围巾
	unsweetened [ˌʌn'swiːtnd]	adj.未加糖的;不甜的
	acquaint [ə'kweɪnt]	vt.使了解;使熟知;告知
	saucer ['sɔːsə(r)]	n.茶托;碟子
	cent [sent]	n.分
	excite [ɪk'saɪt]	vt.使兴奋;使激动;刺激;激起
	Mason ['meɪsn]	n.石匠;泥瓦匠
	pitchfork ['pɪtʃfɔːk]	n.干草叉;长柄草耙
	Negro ['niːɡrəʊ]	adj.黑人的
	trickle ['trɪkl]	vi.滴流;慢慢移动
	backbone ['bækbəʊn]	n.脊骨;骨干;骨气;毅力
	angrily ['æŋɡrəli]	adv.气愤地
	eyeball ['aɪbɔːl]	n.眼球;眼珠
	subterfuge ['sʌbtəfjuːdʒ]	n.遁词;借口;托辞
	primitive ['prɪmətɪv]	adj.原始的;简陋的
	nigh [naɪ]	adj.近的;直接的;左侧的
	blur [blɜː(r)]	v.弄脏;使 ... 模糊
	stubborn ['stʌbən]	adj.顽固的;倔强的;难对付的
	conscientious [ˌkɒnʃɪ'enʃəs]	adj.认真的;谨慎的;负责的
	injustice [ɪn'dʒʌstɪs]	n.不公正;不公正的行为
	thrust [θrʌst]	v.刺;插入;推挤
	submission [səb'mɪʃn]	n.提交;服从;屈服;【律】意见
	autumn ['ɔːtəm]	n.秋季
	linen ['lɪnɪn]	n.亚麻布;亚麻线;亚麻制品
	lace [leɪs]	n.鞋带;饰带;花边;缎带
	indicative [ɪn'dɪkətɪv]	adj.指示的;暗示的;【语】陈述的
	earring ['ɪərɪŋ]	n.耳环;耳饰
	haunt [hɔːnt]	vt. 常去，常到(某地);
	sorrowful ['sɒrəʊfl]	adj.悲伤的;使人伤心的
	crap [kræp]	n.废话;质量差的东西;垃圾;粪便
	meditation [ˌmedɪ'teɪʃn]	n.沉思;冥想
	liable ['laɪəbl]	a. 有(法律)责任的；有义务的;
	mouthful ['maʊθfʊl]	n.一口;又长又拗口的词
	conversation [ˌkɒnvə'seɪʃn]	n.谈话;会话
	rend [rend]	v.撕破;分裂;劈开;强夺
	Mick [mɪk]	n. 爱尔兰佬
	Northerner ['nɔːðənə(r)]	n.北方人.
	Eagerness ['iːgənɪs]	n.渴望;热心
	crumble ['krʌmbl]	v.崩溃;弄碎;破灭
	wink [wɪŋk]	n.眨眼;使眼色;瞬间
	cogitate ['kɒdʒɪteɪt]	v.思考;考虑
	drunken ['drʌŋkən]	adj.常醉的;喝醉的
	holler ['hɒlə(r)]	v.叫喊;发牢骚
	rainy ['reɪni]	adj.多雨的;下雨的
	maternity [mə'tɜːnəti]	n.母性;母亲身份;产科病房
	friendliness ['frendlinəs]	n.友好;亲切
	handicap ['hændikæp]	n.障碍
	heap [hiːp]	n.堆;许多;破车
	deaf [def]	adj.聋的;充耳不闻的
	biggity ['bɪɡɪtɪ]	1.【口】自负的
	Baptist ['bæptɪst]	n.施洗者约翰;施洗者;浸信会教友
	oily ['ɔɪli]	adj.含油的;像油的;油腔滑调的
	gradual ['ɡrædʒuəl]	adj.逐渐的;逐步的;平缓的
	footstep ['fʊtstep]	n.脚步;脚步声;足迹
	Highboy ['haɪbɔɪ]	n.有脚的高橱
	acquaintance [ə'kweɪntəns]	n.熟人;相识;了解
	uneasy [ʌn'iːzi]	adj.不自在的；心神不安的；不稳定的;不舒服的
	horseshoe ['hɔːsʃuː]	n.马蹄铁;U形物;马蹄形
	quietness ['kwaɪətnəs]	n.平静;安定;安静
	crease [kriːs]	n.折痕;皱痕;(板球球手位置的)界限线
	blunt [blʌnt]	adj.钝的;迟钝的;直率的
	hammer ['hæmə(r)]	n.锤子;榔头
	indifference [ɪn'dɪfrəns]	n.不重视;无兴趣;漠不关心
	Hush [hʌʃ]	n.肃静;安静;沉默
	mumble ['mʌmbl]	v.喃喃而语;咕哝
	Shakespeare [ˈʃeɪkspɪə]	n.莎士比亚(英国诗人、剧作家)
	Lewis ['lʊɪs]	路易斯(人名)
	Augustus [ˈɔːgʌstəs]	n.奥古斯都(罗马帝国第一代皇帝)
	Benedict [ˈbenɪdɪkt]	n.新婚的男人
	moan [məʊn]	n.呻吟声;抱怨声