TIME BEGAN TO TRIP ALONG MUCH MORE QUICKLY than before. School, work, andJacob—though not necessarily in that order—created a neat and effortless pattern to follow. And Charliegot his wish: I wasn't miserable anymore. Of course, I couldn't fool myself completely. When I stoppedto take stock of my life, which I tried not to do too often, I couldn't ignore the implications of mybehavior.
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I was like a lost moon—my planet destroyed in some cataclysmic, disaster-movie scenario ofdesolation—that continued, nevertheless, to circle in a tight little orbit around the empty space left behind,ignoring the laws of gravity.
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I was getting better with my bike, which meant fewer bandages to worry Charlie. But it also meant thatthe voice in my head began to fade, until I heard it no more. Quietly, I panicked. I threw myself into thesearch for the meadow with slightly frenzied intensity. I racked my brain for other adrenaline-producingactivities.
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I didn't keep track of the days :hat passed—there was no reason, as I tried to live as much in the presentas possible, no past fading, no future impending. So I was surprised by the date when Jacob brought itup on one of our homework days. He was waiting when I pulled up in front of his house.
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"Happy Valentine's Day," Jacob said, smiling, but ducking his head as he greeted me.
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He held out a small, pink box, balancing it on his palm. Conversation hearts.
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"Well, I feel like a schmuck," I mumbled. "Is today Valentine's Day?"Jacob shook his head with mock sadness. "You can be so out of it sometimes. Yes, it is the fourteenthday of February. So are you going to be my Valentine? Since you didn't get me a fifty-cent box of candy,it's the least you can do."I started to feel uncomfortable. The words were teasing, but only on the surface.
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"What exactly does that entail?" I hedged.
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"The usual—slave for life, that kind of thing.""Oh, well, if that's all…" I took the candy. But I was trying to think of some way to make the boundariesclear. Again. They seemed to get blurred a lot with Jacob.
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"So, what are we doing tomorrow? Hiking, or the ER?""Hiking," I decided. "You're not the only one who can be obsessive. I'm starting to think I imagined thatplace…" I frowned into space.
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"We'll find it," he assured me. "Bikes Friday?" he offered.
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I saw a chance and took it without taking time to think it through.
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"I'm going to a movie Friday. I've been promising my cafeteria crowd that I would go out forever." Mikewould be pleased.
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But Jacob's face fell. I caught the expression in his dark eyes before he dropped them to look at theground.
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"You'll come too, right?" I added quickly. "Or will it be too much of a drag with a bunch of boringseniors?" So much for my chance to put some distance between us. I couldn't stand hurting Jacob; we seemed to be connected in an odd way, and his pain set off little stabs of my own. Also, the idea ofhaving his company for the ordeal—I had promised Mike, but really didn't feel any enthusiasm at thethought of following through—was just too tempting.
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"You'd like me to come, with your friends there?""Yes," I admitted honestly, knowing as I continued that I was probably shooting myself in the foot withmy words. "I'll have a lot more fun if you're there. Bring Quil, and we'll make it a party.""Quil's gonnafreak. Senior girls." He chortled and rolled his eyes. I didn't mention Embry, and neither didhe. I laughed, too. "I'll try to get hin a good selection."I broached the subject with Mike in English.
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"Hey, Mike," I said when class was over. "Are you free Friday night?"He looked up, his blue eyes instantly hopeful. "Yeah, I am. You want to go out?"I worded my reply carefully. "I was thinking about getting a group"—I emphasized the word—"togetherto go see Crosshairs." I'd done my homework this time—even reading the movie spoilers to be sure Iwouldn't be caught off guard. This movie was supposed to be a bloodbath from start to finish. I wasn't sorecovered that I could stand to sit through a romance. "Does that sound like fun?""Sure," he agreed, visibly less eager.
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"Cool."After a second, he perked back up to near his former excitement level. "How about we get Angela andBen? Or Eric and Katie?"He was determined to make this some kind of double date, apparently.
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"How about both?" I suggested "And Jessica, too, of course. And Tyler and Conner, and maybeLauren," I tacked on grudgingly. I had promised Quil variety.
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"Okay," Mike muttered, foiled.
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"And," I continued, "I've got a couple of friends from La Push I'm inviting. So it sounds like we'll needyour Suburban if everyone comes."Mike's eyes narrowed in suspicion.
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"These are the friends you spend all your time studying with now?""Yep, the very ones," I answered cheerfully. "Though you could look at it as tutoring—they're onlysophomores.""Oh," Mike said, surprised. After a second of thought, he smiled.
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In the end, though, the Suburban wasn't necessary.
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Jessica and Lauren claimed to be busy as soon as Mike let it slip that I was involved in the planning. Ericand Katie already had plans—it was their three-week anniversary or something. Lauren got to Tyler andConner before Mike could, so those two were also busy. Even Quil was out—grounded for fighting atschool. In the end, only Angela and Ben, and, of course Jacob, were able to go.
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The diminished numbers didn't dampen Mike's anticipation, though. It was all he could talk about Friday.
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"Are you sure you don't want to see Tomorrow and Forever instead?" he asked at lunch, naming thecurrent romantic comedy that was ruling the box office. "Rotten Tomatoes gave it a better review.""I want to see Crosshairs" I insisted. "I'm in the mood for action. Bring on the blood and guts!""Okay." Mike turned away, but not before I saw his maybe-she's-crazy-after-all expression.
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When I got home from school, a very familiar car was parked in front of my house. Jacob was leaningagainst the hood, a huge grin lighting up his face.
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"No way!" I shouted as I jumped out of the truck. "You're done! I can't believe it! You finished theRabbit!"He beamed. "Just last night. This is the maiden voyage.""Incredible." I held my hand up for a high five.
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He smacked his hand against mine, but left it there, twisting his fingers through mine. "So do I get to drivetonight?""Definitely," I said, and then I sighed.
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"What's wrong?""I'm giving up—I can't top this one. So you win. You're oldest."He shrugged, unsurprised by my capitulation. "Of course I am."Mike's Suburban chugged around the corner. I pulled my hand out of Jacob's, and he nude a face that Iwasn't meant to see.
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"I remember this guy," he said in a low voice as Mike parked across the street. "The one who thoughtyou were his girlfriend. Is he still confused?"I raised one eyebrow. "Some people are hard to discourage.""Then again," Jacob said thoughtfully, "sometimes persistence pays off.""Most of the time it's just annoying, though."Mike got out of his car and crossed the road.
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"Hey, Bella," he greeted me, and then his eyes turned wary as he looked up at Jacob. I glanced briefly atJacob, too, trying to be objective. He really didn't look like a sophomore at all. He was just sobig—Mike's head barely cleared Jacob's shoulder; I didn't even want to think where I measured next tohim—and then his face was older-looking than it used to be, even a month ago.
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"Hey, Mike! Do you remember Jacob Black?""Not really." Mike held out his hand.
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"Old family friend," Jacob introduced himself, shaking hands. They locked hands with more force thannecessary. When their grip broke, Mike flexed his fingers.
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I heard the phone ringing from the kitchen.
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"I'd better get that—it might be Charlie," I told them, and dashed inside.
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It was Ben. Angela was sick with the stomach flu, and he didn't feel like coming without her. Heapologized for bailing on us.
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I walked slowly back to the waiting boys, shaking my head. I really hoped Angela would feel bettersoon, but I had to admit that I was selfishly upset by this development. Just the three of us, Mike andJacob and me, together for the evening—this had worked out brilliantly, I thought with grim sarcasm.
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It didn't seem like Jake and Mike had made any progress towards friendship in my absence. They wereseveral yards apart, facing away from each other as they waited for me; Mike's expression was sullen,though Jacob's was cheerful as always.
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"Ang is sick," I told them glumly. "She and Ben aren't coming.""I guess the flu is making another round. Austin and Conner were out today, too. Maybe we should dothis another time," Mike suggested.
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Before I could agree, Jacob spoke.
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"I'm still up for it. But if you'd rather to stay behind, Mike—""No, I'm coming," Mike interrupted. "I was just thinking of Angela and Ben. Let's go." He started towardhis Suburban.
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"Hey, do you mind if Jacob drives?" I asked. "I told him he could—he just finished his car. He built itfrom scratch, all by himself," I bragged, proud as a PTA mom with a student on the principal's list.
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"Fine," Mike snapped.
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"All right, then," Jacob said, as if that settled everything. He seemed more comfortable than anyone else.
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Mike climbed in the backseat of the Rabbit with a disgusted expression.
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Jacob was his normal sunny self, chattering away until I'd all but forgotten Mike sulking silently in theback.
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And then Mike changed his strategy. He leaned forward, resting his chin on the shoulder of my seat; hischeek almost touched mine. I shifted away, turning my back toward the window.
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"Doesn't the radio work in this thing?" Mike asked with a hint of petulance, interrupting Jacobmid-sentence.
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"Yes," Jacob answered. "But Bella doesn't like music."I stared at Jacob, surprised. I'd never told him that.
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"Bella?" Mike asked, annoyed.
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"He's right," I mumbled, still looking at Jacob's serene profile.
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"How can you not like music?" Mike demanded.
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I shrugged. "I don't know. It just irritates me." "Hmph." Mike leaned away.
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When we got to the theater, Jacob handed me a ten-dollar bill.
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"What's this?" I objected.
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"I'm not old enough to get into this one," he reminded me.
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I laughed out loud. "So much for relative ages. Is Billy going to kill me if I sneak you in?""No. I told him you were planning to corrupt my youthful innocence."I snickered, and Mike quickened his pace to keep up with us.
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I almost wished that Mike had decided to bow out. He was still sullen—not much of an addition to theparty. But I didn't want to end up on a date alone with Jacob, either. That wouldn't help anything.
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The movie was exactly what it professed to be. In just the opening credits, four people got blown up andone got beheaded. The girl in front of me put her hands over her eyes and turned her face into her date'schest. He patted her shoulder, and winced occasionally, too. Mike didn't look like he was watching. Hisface was stiff as he glared toward the fringe of curtain above the screen.