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记忆传授人|The Giver

第九章 特殊规则|Chapter 9

属类: 双语小说 【分类】魔幻小说 阅读:[13600]
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在他十二年的成长岁月中,乔纳思首次体悟到什么叫做隔离和与众不同。他记得首席长老说过:他的训练是在隔离的状况下,单独进行的。

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虽然训练尚未展开,但是在离开大礼堂时,他已经领略到被分隔开来的滋味。他握着资料夹,穿过人群,寻找家人和亚瑟。大家纷纷让路给他,注视着他,并低声耳语。

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“亚瑟!”他在停车场看见朋友,赶紧大叫,“我们一起骑回家吗?”

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“当然啦!”亚瑟的笑容一如往昔,亲切又熟悉,但乔纳思隐隐觉得亚瑟好像迟疑了一下。

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“恭喜啦!”亚瑟说。

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“我才要恭喜你呢!”乔纳思回答,“当她提起‘打打’这件往事时,真是有趣儿,你获得的掌声比谁都多。”

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刚晋升为十二岁的孩子这时也聚集过来,小心翼翼地把资料夹放入自行车后的提篮里,准备回家后再拿出来研读。过去这几年,孩子们晚上都得背诵学校功课,总是一边背,一边无聊地打哈欠。今晚可就不同了,他们是用期待的心情来背诵未来的工作规则。

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“恭喜你,亚瑟!”有人大叫,同样又迟疑了一下才说,“也恭喜你,乔纳思!”

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乔纳思和亚瑟也礼貌地恭贺对方。乔纳思看见爸爸和妈妈在自行车旁,远远地望着他。莉莉已经坐上后座,系好安全带了。

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他挥挥手,他们也笑着挥挥手。他注意到莉莉表情很严肃,大拇指含在嘴里。

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在回家的路上,他跟亚瑟的交流只是几个小笑话和一些无关紧要的话。

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他在家门口下车,对亚瑟大叫:“明天早上见,娱乐中心主任助理!”

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亚瑟继续往前骑:“好的,再见!”

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亚瑟大声响应的瞬间,他再一次感觉到他们长期建立的友谊,似乎有些走调。也许是他多虑了,跟亚瑟在一起,不可能有什么改变的。

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那天的晚餐静得出奇,只有莉莉叽叽喳喳,提出一大堆有关未来义工生涯的规划。她说她要先到育婴中心服务,因为她已经是喂加波吃饭的专家啦。

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“我知道,”当爸爸对她投来警告的眼光时,她立刻补充说,“我不会提他名字的,我会假装自己不知道。我等不及了,好希望明天赶快来呢!”她快乐地说。

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乔纳思不安地叹了一口气:“我可以等!”他喃喃自语。

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“大家都很尊敬你的工作,”妈妈说,“爸爸和我为你感到骄傲。”

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“那是我们社区最重要的工作。”爸爸说。

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“但是几天前,你说指派的工作是最重要的工作!”

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妈妈点点头:“这不一样。这不是工作,真的。我想都没想过,也没想到……”妈妈停顿了一下,“因为向来只有一个记忆传承人。”

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“但是,首席长老说十年前做过一次遴选,结果失败了。

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她指的是什么?”

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爸爸和妈妈迟疑了半晌,最后爸爸叙说了上一次的遴选结果:“上次的情况跟今天很像——同样充满悬疑,乔纳思。

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当所有的十一岁孩子都获得指派的工作后,他们才宣布那位被选中的人……”

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乔纳思插嘴问:“他叫什么名字?”

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妈妈回答,“是一个女生,不是男生。但是我们不能再提她的名字,也不能再用这个名字为新生儿命名。”

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乔纳思很震惊。如果有哪个名字“再也不能提起”,那可是奇耻大辱啊。

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“她怎么了?”他紧张地问。

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爸爸妈妈面有难色。“我们不清楚,”爸爸很不自在地说,“我们再也没见过她。”

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屋子里静悄悄的,他们只是默默地彼此望着。最后妈妈站了起来,说:“你获得了最尊贵的荣耀,乔纳思,最尊贵的荣耀。”

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乔纳思独自在卧室里,铺好床,打开了自己的资料夹。

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他注意到有些同学的资料夹好大一沓,上头印满了字。他猜想班上那位科学家——本杰明,一定是轻松地读着一页又一页的规则和说明。他也想象得到,费欧娜一定是带着微笑,看着单子上所列的未来该学的方法和该尽的义务。

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但是他的资料夹只有薄薄的一张,他读了两遍:

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乔纳思

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记忆传承人

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一、每天下课后,直接到养老院后面的安尼斯入口处报到。

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二、每天训练结束后,立刻回家。

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三、从现在开始可不受规则约束,有权向任何一位市民发问,并保证获得答案。

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四、禁止谈论训练内容,包括双亲和长老会在内。

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五、从现在开始,不再跟别人分享梦境。

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六、除非疾病或伤势与训练无关,否则禁止申请任何药物。

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七、不得申请解放。

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八、可以说谎。

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乔纳思愣住了。他跟朋友的友谊怎么维持?他那些不花脑筋的球类游戏呢?沿着河岸骑自行车散心呢?对他来说,那是一段既快乐又重要的时光。他们为什么要剥夺呢?这些简单、合乎逻辑的指示,他可以理解,因为每个十二岁的孩子都一定会被告知:到哪里、如何去以及何时接受训练。但是他还是有一点失望,很明显的,在他的课表里,完全没有任何休闲时间。

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可以不受规则约束这条也令他相当吃惊。不过,再读一次后,他知道并不是强迫他违规,只是允许他有更大的选择权。他很确定,他永远也不会利用这条来为所欲为。他早已习惯遵循社区的规则,一想到要探人隐私,他就浑身不自在。

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至于不再分享梦境这条,倒不成问题。他很少做梦,分享梦境对他来说本来就不容易,他很高兴可以免除这项义务。只是以后早餐时该怎么办呢?如果他做梦了,是否跟过去一样,只要告诉家人他没做梦就好?这就是说谎了。还有,最后一条规则说……哎,这最后一条规则他还没准备好去理它呢。

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对于药物的限制,他感到很为难。居民用药一向非常便利,就连孩子都可通过双亲拿到。上次他的手指头被门压伤,他赶紧忍痛通过广播通知妈妈。她一要求止痛药,药物马上送到。几乎是在同一时间,他手上的剧痛立即消除,只剩轻微的颤动,现在只能靠回忆才能唤起上次的体验。

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再读一次第六条规则,他了解压伤手指可归类为“跟训练无关”的伤势。虽然打从那次意外后,他就对厚重的大门特别留意,也很确定不会再旧事重演。可是如果真的再度发生,他还是可以申请药物治疗。

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现在每天早上所吃的药丸,也跟训练无关,所以他还是继续吃。

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可是一想到首席长老说训练过程必须承受很大的痛楚,他就打从心里不安。她还说那是难以形容的痛楚。

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乔纳思用力吞了一下口水,实在很难想象那会是怎样的痛楚,而且还不能服药。这实在超出他的理解。

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他对第七条规则毫无异议,因为他从未想过要申请解放。

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他强迫自己再读一次最后一条规则。打从启蒙开始接受教育,打从开始学习使用语言,他就没说过谎。这是学习正确用语不可或缺的环节。他四岁时,有一次在学校午餐前说了一句:“我饿死了。”

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结果马上被带到旁边,上了一堂精确使用语言的课程。

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在课堂上他学懂了他不是“饿死了”,而是“肚子很饿”。在社区里没人会饿死。过去也从来没人饿死,未来更不可能有人会饿死。说“饿死了”,就等于是在说谎。当然,这是一个不经意地说谎。要大家精确地使用语言,就是希望大家不会不经意地说谎。他了解这一点吗?他们问他。他果然了解。

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在他的记忆里,他再也不敢说谎。亚瑟不会说谎,莉莉不会说谎,爸爸妈妈不会说谎,没有人会说谎,除非……

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一个念头突然浮现乔纳思的脑海里,连他自己都吓了一大跳:是否其他人——大人——在晋升为十二岁时,都收到同样可怕的指令呢?

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是否他们都被指示:可以说谎。

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他的内心受到很大的冲击。现在,他有权向任何人提问——而且一定会有答案——就用想象的吧(虽然还是很难想象),他可以问某个大人,也许就问爸爸:“你说谎吗?”

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不过,他也无从知道他所获得的答案是不是真的。

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Now, for the first time in his twelve years of life, Jonas felt separate, different. He remembered what the Chief Elder had said: that his training would be alone and apart.

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But his training had not yet begun and already, upon leaving the Auditorium , he felt the apartness. Holding the folder she had given him, he made his way through the throng , looking for his family unit and for Asher. People moved aside for him. They watched him. He thought he could hear whispers.

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"Ash!" he called, spotting his friend near the rows of bicycles. "Ride back with me?"

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"Sure." Asher smiled, his usual smile, friendly and familiar. But Jonas felt a moment of hesitation from his friend, an uncertainty .

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"Congratulations," Asher said.

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"You too," Jonas replied. "It was really funny, when she told about the smacks . You got more applause than almost anybody else."

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The other new Twelves clustered nearby, placing their folders carefully into the carrying containers on the backs of the bikes. In each dwelling tonight they would be studying the instructions for the beginning of their training. Each night for years the children had memorized the required lessons for school, often yawning with boredom . Tonight they would all begin eagerly to memorize the rules for their adult Assignments.

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"Congratulations, Asher!" someone called. Then that hesitation again. "You too, Jonas!"

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Asher and Jonas responded with congratulations to their group mates. Jonas saw his parents watching him from the place where their own bicycles were waiting. Lily had already been strapped into her seat.

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He waved. They waved back, smiling, but he noticed that Lily was watching him solemnly, her thumb in her mouth.

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He rode directly to his dwelling, exchanging only small jokes and unimportant remarks with Asher.

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"See you in the morning, Recreation Director!" he called, dismounting by his door as Asher continued on.

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"Right! See you!" Asher called back. Once again, there was just a moment when things weren’t quite the same, weren’t quite as they had always been through the long friendship. Perhaps he had imagined it. Things couldn’t change, with Asher.

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The evening meal was quieter than usual. Lily chattered about her plans for volunteer work; she would begin, she said, at the Nurturing Center, since she was already an expert at feeding Gabriel.

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"I know," she added quickly, when her father gave her a warning glance, "I won’t mention his name. I know I’m not supposed to know his name.

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"I can’t wait for tomorrow to come," she said happily. Jonas sighed uneasily. "I can," he muttered.

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"You’ve been greatly honored," his mother said. "Your father and I are very proud."

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"It’s the most important job in the community," Father said.

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"But just the other night, you said that the job of making Assignments was the most important!"

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Mother nodded. "This is different. It’s not a job, really. I never thought, never expected — " She paused. "There’s only one Receiver."

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"But the Chief Elder said that they had made a selection before, and that it failed. What was she talking about?"

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Both of his parents hesitated. Finally his father described the previous selection. "It was very much as it was today, Jonas — the same suspense , as one Eleven had been passed over when the Assignments were given. Then the announcement, when they singled out the one — "

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Jonas interrupted. "What was his name?"

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His mother replied, "Her, not his. It was a female. But we are never to speak the name, or to use it again for a newchild.”

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Jonas was shocked. A name designated Not-to-Be-Spoken indicated the highest degree of disgrace.

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"What happened to her?" he asked nervously .

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But his parents looked blank. "We don’t know," his father said uncomfortably. "We never saw her again."

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A silence fell over the room. They looked at each other. Finally his mother, rising from the table, said, "You’ve been greatly honored, Jonas. Greatly honored."

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Alone in his sleeping room prepared for bed, Jonas opened his folder at last. Some of the other Twelves, he had noticed, had been given folders thick with printed pages. He imagined Benjamin, the scientific male in his group, beginning to read pages of rules and instructions with relish . He pictured Fiona smiling her gentle smile as she bent over the lists of duties and methods that she would be required to learn in the days to come.

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But his own folder was startlingly close to empty. Inside there was only a single printed sheet. He read it twice.

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JONAS RECEIVER OF MEMORY 1. Go immediately at the end of school hours each day to the Annex entrance behind the end of the House of the Old and present yourself to the attendant.

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2. Go immediately to your dwelling at the conclusion of Training Hours each day.

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3. From this moment you are exempted from rules governing rudeness. You may ask any question of any citizen and you will receive answers.

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4. Do not discuss your training with any other member of the community, including parents and Elders.

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5. From this moment you are prohibited from dream-telling.

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6. Except for illness or injury unrelated to your training, do not apply for any any medication.

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7. You are not permitted to apply for release.

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8. You may lie.

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Jonas was stunned . What would happen to his friendships? His mindless hours playing ball, or riding his bike along the river? Those had been happy and vital times for him. Were they to be completely taken from him, now? The simple logistic instructions — where to go, and when — were expected. Every Twelve had to be told, of course, where and how and when to report for training. But he was a little dismayed that his schedule left no time, apparently , for recreation.

39

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The exemption from rudeness startled him. Reading it again, however, he realized that it didn’t compel him to be rude; it simply allowed him the option. He was quite certain he would never take advantage of it. He was so completely, so thoroughly accustomed to courtesy within the community that the thought of asking another citizen an intimate question, of calling someone’s attention to an area of awkwardness, was unnerving.

40

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The prohibition of dream-telling, he thought, would not be a real problem. He dreamed so rarely that the dream-telling did not come easily to him anyway, and he was glad to be excused from it. He wondered briefly , though, how to deal with it at the morning meal. What if he did dream — should he simply tell his family unit, as he did so often, anyway, that he hadn’t? That would be a lie. Still, the final rule said...well, he wasn’t quite ready to think about the final rule on the page.

41

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The restriction of medication unnerved him. Medication was always available to citizens, even to children, through their parents. When he had crushed his finger in the door, he had quickly, gasping into the speaker, notified his mother; she had hastily requisitioned relief-of-pain medication which had promptly been delivered to his dwelling. Almost instantly the excruciating pain in his hand had diminished to the throb which was, now, all he could recall of the experience.

42

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Re-reading rule number 6, he realized that a crushed finger fell into the category of "unrelated to training." So if it ever happened again — and he was quite certain it wouldn’t; he had been very careful near heavy doors since the accident! — he could still receive medication.

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The pill he took now, each morning, was also unrelated to training. So he would continue to receive the pill.

44

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But he remembered uneasily what the Chief Elder had said about the pain that would come with his training. She had called it indescribable.

45

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Jonas swallowed hard, trying without success to imagine what such pain might be like, with no medication at all. But it was beyond his comprehension.

46

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He felt no reaction to rule number 7 at all. It had never occurred to him that under any circumstances, ever, he might apply for release.

47

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Finally he steeled himself to read the final rule again. He had been trained since earliest childhood, since his earliest learning of language, never to lie. It was an integral part of the learning of precise speech. Once, when he had been a Four, he had said, just prior to the midday meal at school, "I’m starving."

48

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Immediately he had been taken aside for a brief private lesson in language precision. He was not starving, it was pointed out. He was hungry. No one in the community was starving, had ever been starving, would ever be starving. To say "starving" was to speak a lie. An unintentional lie, of course. But the reason for precision of language was to ensure that unintentional lies were never uttered. Did he understand that? they asked him. And he had.

49

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He had never, within his memory, been tempted to lie. Asher did not lie. Lily did not lie. His parents did not lie. No one did. Unless...Now Jonas had a thought that he had never had before. This new thought was frightening. What if others — adults — had, upon becoming Twelves, received in their instructions the same terrifying sentence?

50

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What if they had all been instructed: You may lie?

51

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His mind reeled. Now, empowered to ask questions of utmost rudeness — and promised answers — he could, conceivably (though it was almost unimaginable), ask someone, some adult, his father perhaps: "Do you lie?"

52

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But he would have no way of knowing if the answer he received were true.

53

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