When he left the Athelnys’ Philip walked down Chancery Lane and along the Strand to get a ‘bus at the top of Parliament Street. One Sunday, when he had known them about six weeks, he did this as usual, but he found the Kennington ‘bus full. It was June, but it had rained during the day and the night was raw and cold.
He walked up to Piccadilly Circus in order to get a seat; the ‘bus waited at the fountain, and when it arrived there seldom had more than two or three people in it. This service ran every quarter of an hour, and he had some time to wait. He looked idly at the crowd. The public-houses were closing, and there were many people about. His mind was busy with the ideas Athelny had the charming gift of suggesting.
Suddenly his heart stood still. He saw Mildred. He had not thought of her for weeks. She was crossing over from the corner of Shaftesbury Avenue and stopped at the shelter till a string of cabs passed by. She was watching her opportunity and had no eyes for anything else. She wore a large black straw hat with a mass of feathers on it and a black silk dress; at that time it was fashionable for women to wear trains; the road was clear, and Mildred crossed, her skirt trailing on the ground, and walked down Piccadilly.
Philip, his heart beating excitedly, followed her. He did not wish to speak to her, but he wondered where she was going at that hour; he wanted to get a look at her face. She walked slowly along and turned down Air Street and so got through into Regent Street. She walked up again towards the Circus. Philip was puzzled. He could not make out what she was doing. Perhaps she was waiting for somebody, and he felt a great curiosity to know who it was.
She overtook a short man in a bowler hat, who was strolling very slowly in the same direction as herself; she gave him a sidelong glance as she passed. She walked a few steps more till she came to Swan and Edgar’s, then stopped and waited, facing the road. When the man came up she smiled. The man stared at her for a moment, turned away his head, and sauntered on. Then Philip understood.
He was overwhelmed with horror. For a moment he felt such a weakness in his legs that he could hardly stand; then he walked after her quickly; he touched her on the arm.
She turned round with a violent start. He thought that she reddened, but in the obscurity he could not see very well. For a while they stood and looked at one another without speaking. At last she said:
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"想不到在这儿见到你!"
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‘Fancy seeing you!’
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菲利普一时不知说什么是好,浑身震颤不已。他思绪万千,心潮起伏,情难自禁。
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He did not know what to answer; he was horribly shaken; and the phrases that chased one another through his brain seemed incredibly melodramatic.
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"真可怕,"他气喘吁吁地说,声音之低,像是说给自己听似的。
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‘It’s awful,’ he gasped , almost to himself.
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米尔德丽德再也没有吭声,转过身子背朝着菲利普,眼睛朝下望着地面。菲利普感到自己的脸因痛苦而扭曲着。
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She did not say anything more, she turned away from him, and looked down at the pavement. He felt that his face was distorted with misery .
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"有没有说话的地方?"
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‘Isn’t there anywhere we can go and talk?’
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"我不想跟你说什么,"米尔德丽德脸色冷冷地说。"别缠我了,好吗?"
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‘I don’t want to talk,’ she said sullenly . ‘Leave me alone, can’t you?’
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菲利普陡然想起说不定她眼下急需用钱,一时不得脱身。
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The thought struck him that perhaps she was in urgent need of money and could not afford to go away at that hour.
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"你实在没钱用,我身上倒还有两三个硬币,"菲利普脱口而出。
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‘I’ve got a couple of sovereigns on me if you’re hard up,’ he blurted out.
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"我不懂你的意思。我这是回住处的路上碰巧路过这儿。我想等一位跟我在一起干活的女友。"
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‘I don’t know what you mean. I was just walking along here on my way back to my lodgings . I expected to meet one of the girls from where I work.’
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"我的天哪,你就别说谎了吧,"菲利普喟然叹道。
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‘For God’s sake don’t lie now,’ he said.
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蓦地,他发觉米尔德丽德在嘤嘤抽泣,于是又问道:
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Then he saw that she was crying, and he repeated his question.
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"我们能不能找个地方说个话儿?我能不能上你那儿去呢?"
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‘Can’t we go and talk somewhere? Can’t I come back to your rooms?’
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"使不得,万万使不得,"她呜咽地说。"他们不许我把男人带到那儿去。如果你愿意的话,我明天去找你。"
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‘No, you can’t do that,’ she sobbed . ‘I’m not allowed to take gentlemen in there. If you like I’ll met you tomorrow.’
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菲利普肚里雪亮,米尔德丽德是决不会践约的。这一回他决不轻易放她走了。
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He felt certain that she would not keep an appointment. He was not going to let her go.
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"不能捱到明天,我要你现在就带我去找个地方说话。"
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‘No. You must take me somewhere now.’
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"嗯,好,地方倒是有一个的,不过要付六先令。"
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‘Well, there is a room I know, but they’ll charge six shillings for it.’
She gave him the address, and he called a cab. They drove to a shabby street beyond the British Museum in the neighbourhood of the Gray’s Inn Road, and she stopped the cab at the corner.
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"他们可不喜欢把马车一直赶到门口,"米尔德丽德嘟哝了一句。
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‘They don’t like you to drive up to the door,’ she said.
They were the first words either of them had spoken since getting into the cab. They walked a few yards and Mildred knocked three times, sharply, at a door. Philip noticed in the fanlight a cardboard on which was an announcement that apartments were to let. The door was opened quietly, and an elderly, tall woman let them in. She gave Philip a stare and then spoke to Mildred in an undertone.
Mildred led Philip along a passage to a room at the back. It was quite dark; she asked him for a match, and lit the gas; there was no globe, and the gas flared shrilly . Philip saw that he was in a dingy little bed-room with a suite of furniture, painted to look like pine much too large for it; the lace curtains were very dirty; the grate was hidden by a large paper fan.
Mildred sank on the chair which stood by the side of the chimney-piece. Philip sat on the edge of the bed. He felt ashamed. He saw now that Mildred’s cheeks were thick with rouge , her eyebrows were blackened; but she looked thin and ill, and the red on her cheeks exaggerated the greenishpallor of her skin. She stared at the paper fan in a listless fashion. Philip could not think what to say, and he had a choking in his throat as if he were going to cry. He covered his eyes with his hands.
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"我的上帝,这事真可怕,"菲利普哀戚地叹道。
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‘My God, it is awful,’ he groaned .
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"我真弄不懂你大惊小怪些什么呀,我本以为你心里一定很高兴。"
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‘I don’t know what you’ve got to fuss about. I should have thought you’d have been rather pleased.’
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菲利普没有回话,转眼间她一下子呜咽起来。
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Philip did not answer, and in a moment she broke into a sob .
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"你总不会认为我这么做是因为我喜欢吧?"
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‘You don’t think I do it because I like it, do you?’
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"喔,我亲爱的,"菲利普不由得嚷了起来,"我非常难过,简直难过极了。"
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‘Oh, my dear,’ he cried. ‘I’m so sorry, I’m so awfully sorry.’
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"这对我屁的用处都没有!"
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‘That’ll do me a fat lot of good.’
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菲利普再一次感到无言以对,生怕自己一开口,她会误解为他这是在责备或者嘲笑她。
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Again Philip found nothing to say. He was desperately afraid of saying anything which she might take for a reproach or a sneer .
‘I’ve got her with me in London. I hadn’t got the money to keep her on at Brighton, so I had to take her. I’ve got a room up Highbury way. I told them I was on the stage. It’s a long way to have to come down to the West End every day, but it’s a rare job to find anyone who’ll let to ladies at all.’
‘I didn’t like to, not after what happened, and I didn’t want you to know I was in difficulties. I shouldn’t have been surprised if you’d just told me I’d only got what I deserved.’